Pregnancy, Sunday school, Queues

Hello People,
Hope u are all well. Sun is out today but still chilly in the mornings.
I went to renew my disk for my car (Driver’s Licence) what a pain I tell u know wat it is like when you are told to go 1 place to pay and collect the disk and the person says to you no I don’t deal with that you have to go there or join that queue or that person on the other side will help you.
Anyway I have some more stories for you:

A sobbing little girl stood near a small church from which she had been
turned away because it was "too crowded."
"I can't go to Sunday School," she sobbed to the pastor as he walked by.
Seeing her shabby, unkempt appearance, the pastor guessed the reason and,
taking her by the hand, took her inside and found a place for her in the
Sunday school class. The child was so happy that they found room for her,
and she went to bed that night thinking of the children who have no place
to worship Jesus
Some two years later, this child lay dead in one of the poor tenement
buildings. Her parents called for the kindhearted pastor who had befriended
their daughter to handle the final arrangements.
As her poor little body was being moved, a worn and crumpled red purse was
found which seemed to have been rummaged from some trash dump.
Inside was found 57 cents and a note, scribbled in childish handwriting,
which read: "This is to help build the little church bigger so more
children can go to Sunday School"

For two years she had saved for this offering of love.
When the pastor tearfully read that note, he knew instantly what he would
do. Carrying this note and the cracked, red pocketbook to the pulpit, he
told the story of her unselfish love and devotion.
He challenged his deacons to get busy and raise enough money for the larger
building.
But the story does not end there...
A newspaper learned of the story and published It. It was read by a wealthy
realtor who offered them a parcel of land worth many thousands.
When told that the church could not pay so much, he offered to sell it to
the little church for 57 cents.
Church members made large donations. Checks came from far and wide.
Within five years the little girl's gift had increased to $250,000.00--a
huge sum for that time (near the turn of the century). Her unselfish love
had paid large dividends.
When you are in the city of Philadelphia, look up TempleBaptistChurch, with
a seating capacity of 3,300. And be sure to visit TempleUniversity, where
thousands of students are educated.
Have a look, too, at the Good Samaritan Hospital and at a Sunday School
building which houses hundreds of beautiful children, built so that no
child in the area will ever need to be left outside during Sunday school
time.
In one of the rooms of this building may be seen the picture of the sweet
face of the little girl whose 57 cents, so sacrificially saved, made such
remarkable history. Alongside of it is a portrait of her kind pastor, Dr.
Russel H. Conwell, author of the book, "Acres of Diamonds".
This is a true story, which goes to show WHAT GOD CAN DO WITH 57 CENTS.
May today there be peace within.
May you trust your highest power that you are exactly where you are meant
to be.
May you not forget the infinite possibilities that are born of faith.
May you use those gifts that you have received, and pass on the love that
has been given to you.
May you be content knowing you are a child of God.
Let His presence settle into our bones, and allow your soul the freedom to
sing and dance. It is there for each and every one of you.

MARS SPECTACULAR!
The Red Planet is about to be spectacular! This month and next, Earth is
catching up with Mars in an encounter that will culminate in the closest
approach between the two planets in recorded history. The next time Mars may
come this close is in 2287. Due to the way Jupiter's gravity tugs on Mars
and perturbs its orbit, astronomers can only be certain that Mars has not
come this close to Earth in the Last 5,000 years, but it may be as long as
60,000 years before it happens again.
The encounter will culminate on August 27th when Mars comes to within
34,649,589 miles of Earth and will be (next to the moon) the brightest
object in the night sky. It will attain a magnitude of -2.9 and will appear
25.11 arc seconds wide. At a modest 75-power magnification

Mars will look as large as the full moon to the naked eye. Mars will be easy
to spot. At the beginning of August it will rise in the east at 10pm. and
reach its azimuth at about 3 a.m.
By the end of August when the two planets are closest, Mars will rise at
nightfall and reach its highest point in the sky at 12:30a.m. That's pretty
convenient to see something that no human being has seen in recorded
history. So, mark your calendar at the beginning of August to see Mars grow
progressively brighter and brighter throughout the month.
Share this with your children and grandchildren. NO ONE ALIVE TODAY WILL EVER SEE THIS AGAIN !!!!!!!!
Pregnancy
In a second grade class, a little girl asks, Teacher, can my Mommy get
pregnant?
How old is your mother, dear? asks the teacher.
Forty. she replies.
Yes, dear, your mother could get pregnant.
The little girl then asks, Can my big sister get pregnant?
Well, dear, how old is your sister?
The little girl answers, Nineteen.
Oh yes, dear, your sister certainly could get pregnant.
The little girl then asks, Can I get pregnant?
How old are you, dear?
The little girl answers, I'm seven years old.
No, dear, you can't get pregnant...
Then, the little boy behind the little girl gives her a poke and
says, See, I told you we had nothing to worry about.

Behave urself and live life!
Just do it!
Ciao
Silver:P

Hello, Granny Bday, and jokes!!

Hello People,
Hope u are all well. Sun is out today but still chilly in the mornings.
Well I enjoyed my prawns and chips supper with a side order of olives it was so divine and smothered in garlic and sauce…..lovely mmmm.
Went to go and pay my accounts ah what a pain u know all the endless queues and queries.
My granny’s birthday is soon on the 3rd of July ya I know the same day as Tom Cruise’s birthday. This weekend his movie “Born on the 4th of July” is on.

Joke 1 : Typical Men
In a train compartment, there are 3 men and a ravishing young
girl.
The four passengers join in conversation, which very soon turns to
the erotic.
Then, the young girl proposes, "If each of you will give me R1, I
will show you my legs."
The men, charmed by this young girl, all pull a buck out of their
wallet. And then the girl pulls up her dress a bit to show her
legs.
Then she says, "If each of you gentlemen will give me R10, I'll
show
you my thighs," Men being what they are, they all pull out a ten
rand bill. The girl pulls up her dress all the way to her undies.
Conversation continues, and the men, a bit excited, have all taken
off their coats. Then the young girl says, "If you will give me
R100, I will show you where I was operated on for appendicitis."
Naturally, all three fork over the money. Then the girl turns to
the window and points to a hospital in the distance and says, "There!"

Joke2 :the 4 cats!!!
THE FOUR CATS :This is about the way it goes.
Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were.The first man was an Engineer, the second man was an Accountant, the third man was a Chemist,,,,,,and the fourth man was a Government Employee.To show off, the Engineer called his cat,"T-square, do your stuff."T-square pranced over to the desk, took out some paper and pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.But the Accountant said his cat could do better.He called his cat and said,"Spreadsheet, do your stuff."Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies ............Everyone agreed that was good.But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,"Measure, do your stuff." Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk,, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop into the glass.Everyone agreed that was pretty good.Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said, "What can your cat do?"The Government Employee called his cat and said,,,,,"Coffee Break,,,,do your stuff."Coffee Break jumped to his feet,,,,,,,,ate the cookies,, drank the milk,,,, shat on the paper,,,,,,,, screwed the other three cats,, claimed he injured his back while doing so,,,,, filed a grievance report for unsafe working conditions,,, put in for Workers Compensation....and went home for the rest of the day on sick leave........


Anyway time doesn’t stop for any 1 so let me carry on with my work
Now we are half way through this week so just chill!!! :)
Relax and don’t work 2 hard!! :)
Ciao
Silver
:P

Hello, Jokes, books!!

Hey People
Hope u all are well?
weather her is pretty much confused as per usual hot than cold than hot…..oh, and don’t forget the wind.
I am reading “The Setup” by Paul Erdman, I have only read like 10 pages but it sounds very good. I would suppose they would be like Michael Ridpath’s books intense and interesting and you neva know what gonna happen in the end. Anyway im having prawns and chips for supper tonight hoping they will be devine but im sure they will be!!!
Here some jokes for you: enjoy!!!

How business is done: Conversation between Baboo & his son.> Baboo: I want you to marry a girl of my choice> Son : "I will choose my own bride!"> Baboo: "But the girl is Bill Gates's daughter."> Son : "Well, in that case...ok"> Next Baboo approaches Bill Gates.> Baboo: "I have a husband for your daughter."> Bill Gates: "But my daughter is too young to marry!"> Baboo: "But this young man is a vice-president of the World Bank."> Bill Gates: "Ah, in that case...ok"> Finally Baboo goes to see the president of the World Bank.
Baboo: "I have a young man to be recommended as a vice-president."> President: "But I already have more vice- presidents than I need!"
Baboo: "But this young man is Bill Gates's son-in-law." President: "Ah, in that case...ok" This is how business is done!!
*****************************************************************
Other Jokes: Be Careful What You Promise

>A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be
>confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner.
>Good morning," said the young man. "If I could take a couple of minutes
>of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in
>high-powered vacuum cleaners."
>"Go away!" said the old lady. "I haven't got any money! I'M BROKE!!!"
>And she proceeded to close the door. Quick as a flash, the young man
>wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open. "Don't be too
>hasty!" He said. "Not until you have at least seen my demonstration."
>And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway
>carpet.
>"If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure
>from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder."
>The old lady stepped back and said, "Well I hope you've got a pretty
>good appetite, because they cut off my electricity this morning."
***************************************************************************
Random Acts of Lunacy:A man who shovelled snow for an hour to clear a space for his car during a blizzard in Chicago returned with his vehicle to find a woman had takenthe space.Understandably, he shot her

After stopping for drinks at an illegal bar, a Zimbabwean bus driverfound that the 20 mental patients he was supposed to be transporting fromHarare to Bulawayo had escaped. Not wanting to admit his incompetence, thedriver went to a nearby bus stop and offered everyone waiting there a freeride. He then delivered the passengers to the mental hospital,telling the staffthat the patients were very excitable and prone to bizarre fantasies.Thedeception wasn't discovered for 3 days. Damn I like that one...
An American teenager was in the hospital yesterday recovering fromserious head wounds received from an oncoming train. When asked how he received the injuries, the lad told police that he was simply trying to see how close he could get his head to a moving train before he was hit.
A mother took her daughter to the doctor and asked him to give her anexamination to determine the cause of her daughter's swollen abdomen.It only took the doctor about 2 seconds to say, "Your daughter ispregnant."The mother turned red with fury and she argued with the doctor thather daughter was a good girl and would never compromise her reputation byhaving sex with a boy. The doctor faced the window and silently watched thehorizon. The mother became enraged and screamed, "Quit looking out thewindow! Aren't you paying attention to me?" "Yes, of course I ampaying attention ma'am. It's just that the last time this happened, a starappeared in the East, and three wise men came. And I was hoping that they would show up again.
When his 38-caliber revolver failed to fire at its intended victimduring a hold-up in Long Beach, California, would be robber James Elliot didsomething that can only inspire wonder: He peered down the barrel and tried the trigger again. This time it worked.
The chef at a hotel in Switzerland lost a finger in a meat-cutting machineand, after a little hopping around, submitted a claim to his insurancecompany. The company, suspecting negligence, sent out one of its men tohave a look for himself. He tried the machine out and lost a finger. The chef's claim was approved.
A passenger in a taxi tapped the driver on the shoulder to ask himsomething. The driver screamed, lost control of the cab, nearly hit abus, drove up over the curb, and stopped just inches from a large plateglass window. For a few moments everything was silent in the cab,then thedriver said, Please, don't ever do that again. You scared the daylights out of me."The passenger, who was also frightened, apologised and said he didn'trealise that a tap on the shoulder could frighten him so much, to which thedriver replied: "I'm sorry, it's really not your fault at all. Today is myfirst day driving a cab. I have been driving a hearse for the last 25 years.

What do u call : origin of afrikaner surnames (SA JOKES)

1. a doctor that does circumcisions............Dr. P.P. Snyman

2. an Afrikaaner Gynaecologist...................Dr.Koekemoer

3. an Afrikaner who doesn't go to church............Van NieKerk

4. an Afrikaner who failed June exams..............Viljoen

5. an Afrikaner that trips and falls in the mountains.........Van
der Berg

6. The Afrikaner that votes in EVERY election ......WOUTER

7. The Afrikaner that drives the loud Datsun Stanza........BASSon

8. The Afrikaner that is very well endowed ........De LANGE

9. A Male Afrikaner that prefers other male species...... De KOCK

10. The Afrikaner thats always high.......POTgieter .

Actual comments from US travel agents:

I had someone ask for an aisle seat so that their hair wouldn't get
messed up by being near the window.

A client called in inquiring about a package to Hawaii. After going over
all the cost info, she asked, "Would it be cheaper to fly to California
and then take the train to Hawaii?"

I got a call from a woman who wanted to go to Capetown. I started to
explain the length of the flight and the passport information when she
interrupted me with "I'm not trying to make you look stupid, but
Capetown is in Massachusetts. Without trying to make her look like the
stupid one, I calmly explained, "Cape Cod is in Massachusetts, Capetown
is in Africa." Her response ....click.

A man called, furious about a Florida package we did. I asked what was
wrong with the vacation in Orlando. He said he was expecting an
ocean-view room.
tried to explain that is not possible, since Orlando is in the middle of
the state. He replied, "Don't lie to me. I looked on the map and Florida
is a very thin state."

I got a call from a man who asked, "Is it possible to see England from
Canada?" I said, "No." He said, "But they look so close on the map."

Another man called and asked if he could rent a car in Dallas. When I
pulled up the reservation, I noticed he had a 1-hour layover in Dallas.
When I asked him why he wanted to rent a car, he said, "I heard Dallas
was a big airport, and I need a car to drive between the gates to save
time."

A nice lady just called. She needed to know how it was possible that her
flight from Detroit left at 8:20 am and got into Chicago at 8:33am. I
tried to explain that Michigan was an hour ahead of Illinois, but she
could not understand the concept of time zones. Finally I told her the
plane went very fast, and she bought that!

A woman called and asked, 'Do airlines put your physical description on
your bag so they know whose luggage belongs to who?' I said, 'No, why do
you ask?' She replied, 'Well, when I checked in with the airline, they
put a tag on my luggage that said FAT, and I'm overweight. Is there any
connection?'
After putting her on hold for a minute while I looked into it (I was
actually laughing) I came back and explained the city code for Fresno is
FAT, and that the airline was just putting a destination tag on her
luggage.

I just got off the phone with a man who asked, 'How do I know which
plane to get on?' I asked him what exactly he meant, to which he
replied, 'I was told my flight number is 823, but none of these darn
planes have numbers on them.'

A woman called and said, "I need to fly to Pepsi-Cola on one of those
computer planes." I asked if she meant to fly to Pensacola on a commuter
plane. She said, "Yeah, whatever."

A businessman called and had a question about the documents he needed in
order to fly to China. After a lengthy discussion about passports, I
reminded him he needed a visa. "Oh no I don't, I've been to China many
times and never had to have one of those." I double-checked and sure
enough, his stay required a visa. When I told him this he said, "Look,
I've been to China four times and every time they have accepted my
American Express."

A woman called to make reservations; "I want to go from Chicago to
Hippopotamus, New York." The agent was at a loss for words. Finally,
the agent said, "Are you sure that's the name of the town?" "Yes, what
flights do you have?" replied the customer. After some searching, the
agent came back with, "I'm sorry, ma'am, I've looked up every airport
code in the country and can't find a Hippopotamus anywhere." The
customer retorted, "Oh don't be silly. Everyone knows where it is. Check
your map!" The agent scoured a map of the state of New York and finally
offered, "You don't mean Buffalo, do you?"
"Yeah, that's it! I knew it was a big animal!"

well I hope u enjoyed these and your day!!!
Chat more tomorrow!!
Ciao
Silver:P

Jokes, overcast and im buzy but that's not so unusual!!!

Hi all
A joke 4 u:
A coloured guy, sitting outside his home about to be> evicted from his> house,>
was contemplating how the future would be after he> had divorced his> wife,> lost his children, lost his job. > > He notices a crate of beer bottles and walks up to> it.
He takes out an> empty> bottle, smashing it into the concrete wall swearing,>
"You are the reason> I don't have a wife", second bottle,
"You are the> reason I don't have my> children", third bottle "You are the reason I lost> my job".
> > He notices the fourth bottle is sealed and still> full of beer.
He takes> the> bottle, puts it aside and says> "Staan een kant my broe (Stand 1 side my brother), I know you were not> involved".

I wish the weather would make up his or her mind and decide whether the sun is shining or whether it will be overcast anyways i have been extremelly buzy but whats new rite??
saw the movie "mr & mrs Smith" with Brad Pitt and Angeline Jolie was very good...

I'll Write more tomorrow
Must go
Ciao
Silver :P

Jokes, Books and sayings...Friday at long Last!!!!

Hello People,
Howiz ur day?? Weather is good. Reading “Apt Pupil” by Stephen King and have read “Shawshank Redemption” by Stephen King as well as “The Birthday Girl” by Stephen Leather which all are very good books which seem to keep you pasted into the drama and movement of the story. Plenty action. Below are some sayings jokes…Enjoy!!!

1. A prostitute goes to deposit a R100 in a bank.The teller says, 'Sorry, madam, the note is fake ".
"Oh my God.' exclaimed the prostitute, 'I have been RAPED!
2. Girl enters sex shop and asks the clerk, 'Where is your vibrator section? Clerk: Over there madam. Girl: How much for that red one?
Clerk: Sorry madam, that's a fire extinguisher.
3. Q. What's the definition of gynaecologist?A. The only fool who looks for problems where others try to find pleasure.
4. Love is complicated machinery. But sometimes all you need is a good screw to fix it.
5. SEX is like a card game.
If you don't have a good partner, you better have a good hand.
6. Husband: You never tell me how much you enjoy sex .
Wife: Well, you are never at home at that time.
7. Q: What is virginity? A: It's not dignity. It is lack of opportunity.
8. A man was looking at a painting for a long time of a naked woman, with leaves covering her body.
When asked what he was doing, he answered, 'Waiting for autumn.'

Marriage
I was happy. My girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, And so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way. My friends encouraged me.

And my girlfriend? She was a dream!
There was only one thing bothering me, very much indeed.
That one thing was her younger sister.
My prospective sister-in-law was twenty years of age, wore tight mini skirts, and low cut blouses. She would regularly bend down when near me and I got many a pleasant view of her. It had to be deliberate. She never did it when she was near anyone else. One day little sister called and asked me to come over to check the wedding invitations. She was alone when I arrived. She whispered to me that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she couldn't overcome and didn't really want to overcome.
She told me that she wanted to make love to me just once before I got married and committed my life to her sister. I was in total shock and couldn't say a word. She said, "I'm going upstairs to my bedroom, and if you want to go ahead with it just come up and get me." I was stunned I was frozen in shock as I watched her go up the stairs.
When she reached the top she pulled down her panties and threw them down the stairs at me. I stood there for a moment, then turned and went straight to the front door. I opened the door and stepped out of the house and walked straight towards my car. My future father-in-law was standing outside.

With tears in his eyes he hugged me and said, "We are very happy that you have passed our little test. We couldn't ask for better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."
The moral of this story is:
Always keep your condoms in your car!.

Zuma!?!??! (SA JOKES)
If Zuma and Sheik get into a car, who is driving?
The Policeman.

How many Zuma's does it take to screw in a light bulb?
It depends how much Sheik is willing to pay.

McDonalds has a new Zuma burger.
You get free chippies and a Sheik

They shouldn't have fired Zuma.
He was the best vice president money can buy.

True Friend
A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said...no. She
asked him if he would want to be with her forever....and he said no.
She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, and once again he
replied with a no.
She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her
face, the boy grabbed her arm and said......”You're not pretty you're
beautiful. I don't want to be with you forever, I NEED to be with you
forever. And I wouldn't cry if you walked away…...I'd die!
SO NOW I WILL SAY:

“I like you because of who you are to me....A true friend

Remember: "A good friend will not come bail you out of jail.... But a
true friend will be sitting next to you saying ... WE screwed up! Proud
to be your Friend!

I've learned....That life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it
gets to the end, the faster it goes.

I've learned....That we should be glad God doesn't give us everything we
ask for.

I've learned....That money doesn't buy class.

I've learned....That it's those small daily happenings that make life so
spectacular.

I've learned...That under everyone's hard shell is someone who wants to
be appreciated and loved.

I've learned....That the Lord didn't do it all in one day. What makes
me think I can?

I've learned....That to ignore the facts does not change the facts.

I've learned....That when you plan to get even with someone, you are
only letting that person continue to hurt you.

I've learned...That love, not time, heals all wounds.

I've learned...That the easiest way for me to grow as a person is to
surround myself with people smarter than I am.

I've learned....That everyone you meet deserves to be with a smile.

I've learned....That there's nothing sweeter than sleeping with your
babies and feeling their breath on your cheeks.

I've learned...That no one is perfect until you fall in love with them.

I've learned....That life is tough, but I'm tougher.

I've learned...That opportunities are never lost; someone will take the
ones you miss.

I've learned....That when you harbor bitterness, happiness will dock
elsewhere.

I've learned...That I wish I could have told those I cared about that I
love them one more time before they passed away.

I've learned....That one should keep his words both soft and tender,
because tomorrow he may have to eat them.

I've learned....That a smile is an inexpensive way to improve your
looks.

I've learned....That I can't choose how I feel, but I can choose what I
do about it.

I've learned....That when your newly born child holds your little finger
in his little fist, that you're hooked for life.

I've learned....That everyone wants to live on top of the mountain, but
all the happiness, and growth happens while you're climbing it.

I've learned....That the less time I have to work, the more things I get
done.

Anyway Must go!
Will write on Monday
Ciao
Silver :P

Sun is out, but now the wind!!

Hello People :P
Some jokes for you and some deep thoughts....enjoy!!

Deep thoughts
* A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where train stops. On my desk, I have a work station...

* If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with
"Quit while you're ahead?"

* How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't
live there?

* If it's true that we are here to help others, then
what exactly are
the
OTHERS here for?

* Go ahead and take risks....just be sure that
everything will turn out
OK.

* If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

* Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag?

* Light travels faster than sound. Maybe that's why
some people appear bright until you hear them talk....

* Why is "abbreviated" such a long word?

* If it's zero degrees outside today and it's
supposed to be twice as
cold tomorrow, how cold is it going to be?


There is a new drink on the market. It is beer and milk combined.....and
is called
Shabeer Shake!!
If you drink it, its gives you lots of Zooma (SA JOKE)

The Miracle of Toilet Paper Fresh from my shower, I stood in front of the mirror complaining to my husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically telling me they're not, he un-characteristically comes up with a suggestion. "If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of toilet paper and rub it between them for a few seconds." Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and stand in front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts. "How long will this take?" I asked. "They will grow larger over a period of years," my husband replies. I stopped. " Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?" Without missing a beat he says "Worked for your butt, didn't it?" He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy he may even walk again. Stupid, stupid man.

I'll Write tommorrow
Ciao
Silver :P

Jokes, poems and rain!

Hello People,
Raining here again and it is very overcast and chilly (DBN)!
Hope u are all well. Been buzy but managed to get these for you… lol:P
Here are some jokes and poems for you.

THIS SAYS IT ALL:

Time passes.
Life happens.
Distance separates.
Children grow up.
Jobs come and go.
Love waxes and wanes.
Men don't call when they say they will.
Hearts break.
Parents die.
Colleagues forget favors.
Careers end.
BUT..........
Girlfriends are there, no matter how much time and how
many miles are between you.
A girlfriend is never farther away than needing her can
reach.
When you have to walk that lonesome valley and you have
to walk it by yourself, your girlfriends will be on the valley's rim,
cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on
your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end.
Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you.
Or come in and carry you out.
Girlfriends, daughters, daughter-in-laws, sisters, sisters-in-law,
mother, mother-in-law, aunties, nieces, cousins, and extended family, bless our life!
The world wouldn't be the same without them, and neither would I.
When we began this adventure called womanhood, we had no
idea of the incredible joys or sorrows that lay ahead.
Nor did we
know how much we would need each other.
Every day, we need each other still.
Pass this on to the women who help make your life work.
I just did.


Courtroom TestimonyFor us poor souls that havta work today, here's something to lighten the burden!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
For those of you planning to go on to law school and actually spend time in
a court room (only a small % of attorneys), here are some examples of how
much fun it can be. These are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and now published by court reporters who had the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place.

ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?
WITNESS: No, I just lie there.
______________________________

ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.
_____________________________________

ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?
WITNESS: I forget.
ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?
_____________________________________

ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?
WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?
___________________________________

ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?
WITNESS: Would you repeat the question?
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?
WITNESS: Uh....
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: She had three children, right?
WITNESS: Yes.
ATTORNEY: How many were boys?
WITNESS: None.
ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?
WITNESS: By death.
ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?
WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Doctor, how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead
people?
WITNESS: All my autopsies are performed on dead people.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go
to?
WITNESS: Oral.
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?
WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 p.m.
ATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?
WITNESS: No, he was sitting on the table wondering why I was doing an autopsy on him!
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?
WITNESS: Huh?
______________________________________

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a
pulse?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY Did you check for breathing?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?
WITNESS: No.
ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?
WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.
ATTORNEY: But could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?
WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Behave now hey…
I’ll Write latter!!
Ciao Silver :P

Flights, JHB and MIC!!!

Hey people,
I know I haven’t been writing for like a whole week but im writing now so that’s good rite??
Well, I have been quite busy last week. Wednesday I went to JHB and only got home after 8pm (DBN). It was my first and second flight all in 1 day and as someone said it was my first day of flying. The flight there and back was smooth so that was cool. Jhb looks extremely different to DBN and the traffic words can neva express or describe how busy that traffic is all the time. The houses and business houses look lovely. Though it is very dry up there. But the lights at night in Sandton from the plane looked absolutely stunning have no doubt in your mind they were wonderful. Thursday was the public holiday and the comrades marathon. Friday I stayed home and chilled, Saturday as well. Sunday was Father’s day as well as seen MIC at our church for the website --- http://www.micweb.co.za. They were so cool….
Monday was work as usual. And today u ask…Today is rainy weather but also work as usual. Tomorrow is my dad’s birthday and he will be turning 54.

Here’s a poem for you special people:
Believe that you're special,
through the hurt and the pain,
for sunshine will come, after the rain.
Hold on to your dreams, let them not die
and live not in torment by questioning why?
The answers are somewhere and sometimes unkind,
with so many reasons you will never find.
Be true to yourself, don't be what you're not,
for often you'll find, you're all that you've got.
Don't become battered by games people play
and don't take to heart what others may say.
You've got so much life and so much to give,
go out and enjoy it, go out there and live!
Though heartaches are many and tears they will flow,
the more that you live the more you will grow.
There are many that love you, don't ever forget,
let the past be a lesson, you do not regret.

Will write soon
Ciao
Silver :P

JHB, Weather and stuff !!

Howdy People,

The sun is shining here in DBN but I heard that JHB was 5 degrees today which is where I’m going tomorrow it’s gonna be really cold there. So I will be sure to wear 2 jackets, scarves and boots etc. Thank goodness I am only goin there 4 the day but it is going to be the whole day from about 7:40am til 7:10pm which is when I’ll get back in DBN. My first flight anywhere. Lol…. imagine. I hope I wont be 2 nervous, though im not goin on my own which is a good thing for me but still it ‘s a new thing for me. I should be fine though… I have only been working here though for 3 weeks. Have a lovely public holiday (16th June for those people in S.A) enjoy urselves but behave hey Some Jokes 4 u:
THE PASTOR'S CAT Whoever said the Creator doesn't have a sense of humor?Dwight Nelson recently told a true story about the pastor of his church.He had a kitten that climbed up a tree in his backyard and then was afraid to come down. The pastor coaxed, offered warm milk, etc.The kitty would not come down. The tree was not sturdy enough to climb, so the pastor decided that if he tied a rope to his car and drove awayso that the tree bent down, he could then reach up and get the kitten.That's what he did, all the while checking his progress in the car. He then figured if he went just a little bit further, the tree would be bent sufficiently for him to reach the kitten. But as he moved the car a little further forward, the rope broke. The tree went "boing!" and the kitten instantly sailed through the air-out of sight. The pastor felt terrible. He walked all over the neighbourhood asking people if they'd seen a little kitten. No. Nobody had seen a stray kitten.So he prayed, "Lord, I just commit this kitten to your keeping," and went on about his business.A few days later he was at the grocery store, and met one of his church members. He happened to look into her shopping cart and was amazed to see cat food. This woman was a cat hater and everyone knew it, so he asked her, "Why are you buying cat food when you hate cats so much?"She replied, "You won't believe this," and then told him how her little girl had been begging her for a cat, but she kept refusing. Then a few days before, the child had begged again, so the Mom finally told her little girl, "Well, if God gives you a cat, I'll let you keep it."She told the pastor, "I watched my child go out in the yard, get on her knees, and ask God for a cat. And really, Pastor, you won't believe this, but I saw it with my own eyes. A kitten suddenly came flying out of the blue sky, with its paws outspread, and landed right in front of her."Never underestimate the Power of God and His unique sense of humor.
The Question how was I Born??? Junior asks his Dad, "Daddy, how was I born?" His Dad sighs and replies, "Ah, my son, I guess one day you would have to find out anyway! Well, you see, your Mom and I first got together in a chat room on MSN. Then I set up a date via e-mail with your Mom and we met at a cyber-cafe. We sneaked into a secluded room, where your mother agreed to a download from my hard drive. As soon as I was ready to upload, we discovered that neither one of us had used a firewall, but it was too late to hit the delete button. Six weeks later your Mom sent me an instant message saying that her operating system was showing signs of unauthorised program activity from a self-extracting file which had implanted itself in her BIOS. Then nine months later a little Pop-Up appeared and said:"You've got male."
Hope you enjoyed those lol :P
Anyway hope I will get at least some sleep despite the nerves I will have
Ciao,
Silver :P

Just Jokes!!

What the letters in your name mean:

Apply the formula to your name and be honest about the answer!!
A: You can be very quiet when you have something on your mind.
B: You are always cautious when it comes to meeting new people.
C: You definitely have a partier side in you; don't be shy to show it.
D: You have trouble trusting people, but are very honest and sincere.
E: You are a very exciting person.
F: Everyone loves you.
G: You have excellent ways of viewing people.
H: You are not judgmental.
I: You are always smiling and making others smile.
J: Jealously marks one of your traits, but you can be very artistic and
happy.
K: You like to try new things and the outdoors.
L: You like shopping; love is something you deeply believe in.
M: Success comes easily to you.
N: You like to work, but you always want a break.
O: You are very open-minded, almost never jealous.
P: You are very friendly and understanding.
Q: You are a hypocrite.
R: You are a social butterfly, loved by all, but too ready to please
everyone.
S: You are very broad-minded, studious and elect to avoid physical work.
T: You have an attitude, a big one!
U: You feel like you have to equal up to people's standards.
V: You have a very good physique and looks.
W: You like your privacy.
X: You never let people tell you what to do.
Y: You have incredibly good looks and are fond of teasing.
Z: You are very strong willed and capable of intense love, but must learn
to share.

A Woman's Perspective About Men

1. Men like to barbecue. Men will cook if danger is involved.

2. Men who have pierced ears are better prepared for marriage. They've experienced pain and bought jewellery.

3. Marrying a divorced man is ecologically responsible. In a world where there are more women than men, it pays to recycle.

4. Men are very confident people. My husband is so confident that when he watches sports on television, he thinks that if he concentrates he can help his team. If the team is in trouble, he coaches the
players from our living room, and if they're really in trouble, I have to get off the phone in case they call him.

5. Men have higher body temperatures than women. If your heating goes out in winter, I recommend sleeping next to a man. Men are like portable heaters that snore.

6. If a man prepares dinner for you and the salad contains three or more types of lettuce, he is serious.

7. If a man says, "I'll call you," and he doesn't, he didn't forget... he didn't lose your number... he didn't die. He just didn't want to call you.

8. Getting rid of a man without hurting his masculinity is a problem. "Get out" and "I never want to see you again" might sound like a challenge. If you want to get rid of a man, I suggest saying, "I love you... I want to
marry you... I want to have your children." Sometimes they leave skid marks.


9. Men are self-confident because they grow up identifying with super-heroes. Women have bad self-images because they grow up identifying with Barbie.

10. Male menopause is a lot more fun than female menopause. With female menopause you gain weight and get hot flashes. Male menopause - you get to date young girls and drive motorcycles.

LE STEAK

A man and his wife are seated in a fancy French restaurant for dinner.
After the waiter arrives the man says: "I'll have your biggest, thickest Porterhouse steak."
The waiter replies: "Monsieur.....what about ze mad cow?"
The man replies: "She'll have a salad."

Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the
words back...or that you could crawl into a hole? Here are the
Testimonials of a few people who did....


FIRST CASE:
I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and
asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a bl0w j0b?"I
turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband
didn't say a word...he knew better.

SECOND CASE:

I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I
was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for
several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen
who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking,
I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."

THIRD CASE:

My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a
variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case,
the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No,
I'm just looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically,
the boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my
Sister has never let me forget.

FOURTH CASE:

While in line at the bank one afternoon, my toddler decided to release
some pent-up energy and ran amok. I was finally able to grab hold of
her after receiving looks of disgust and annoyance from other patrons. I
told her that if she did not start behaving "right now" she would be
punished. To my horror, she looked me in the eye and said in a voice
just as threatening, "If you don't let me go right now, I will tell
Grandma that I saw you kissing Daddy's pee-pee last night!" The
silence was deafening after this enlightening exchange. Even the tellers stopped what they were doing. I mustered up the last of my dignity and walked out of the bank with my daughter in tow. The last thing I heard when the door closed behind me, were screams of laughter.

FIFTH CASE:

Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My
three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was
on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch In
between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While
enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my
seven-month-old daughter, and she was clean. Then I realized that Danny
had not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked him if he needed to
go, and he said "No". I kept thinking, "Oh Lord, that child has had an
accident, and I don't have any clothes with me." Then I said, "Danny,
are you SURE you didn't have an accident?" "No," he replied. I just
KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny, did you have an accident?" This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over
and spread his cheeks and yelled, "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FAARRTS!!" While 30
people Nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up
his Pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better by thanking me
for the best laugh they'd ever had!

LAST CASE:

This had most of the state of Michigan laughing for 2 days and a very
embarrassed female news anchor who will, in the future, likely think
before she speaks. What happens when you predict snow but don't get any....? A true story... We had a female news anchor who, the day after it was supposed to have snowed and didn't, turned to the weatherman
and asked: "So Bob, where's that 8 inches you promised me last night?" Not
only did HE have to leave the set, but half the crew did too they were laughing so hard!

The Dream :P
Wife dreaming in the midnight suddenly shouts. ''Quick up! My husband is back!'' Man gets up, jumps out of window, then realizes, ''SHOOT, I'm the husband

Hope u enjoyed these
Ciao
Silver :)

Work, Work and guess what work!!

Hey all,


Well it is Thursday today which is a good thing bcoz it means that tomorrow it’s Friday and then it will be weekend (hallelujah)!!!
So while we are still on today it’s raining cats and dogs but otherwise it’s just a bit chilly. I bought liquorice yesterday bcoz I haven’t had it in such a while and was craving it but anyway it was divine. What else can I tell u …. I have been busy at work but what else is new rite??? lol :P I got my account for the surgery and believe me the price is horrendous. I cant wait to c what my doctors fees are probably just as horrible as the hospitals fee is.

Well I don’t know yet what im gonna be doing this weekend, but I’ll come to me u c im very, very impulsive.
But now im must go, more work 2 do unfortunately
Ciao
Write 2 u all tomorrow
Silver:P

Bird, Blogs and ur bday means...

Hey all,
Here is something for you…enjoy:

Date of birth
Bird
Characteristics

21 Jan - 17 Feb
Robin


A cool exterior disguises a fiery temper and is very opinionated - although those opinions are not always shared by everyone. They are proud and particularly home-loving, although have a tendency to be quarrelsome.

18 Feb - 17 March
Goldfinch


Goldfinch people are colorful characters who are sensitive and always alert. They are gregarious by nature and love being in groups of people, which offers them security. They need to find an outlet for their imaginative abilities or they are sometimes be in danger of becoming nervous and irritable.

18 March - 14 April
Hawk


A powerful individual which displays courage and a sometimes ruthless determination. Avoids problematical obstacles with skill, although must be fully targeted so as not to waste energy in fruitless chases for the impossible.

15 April - 12 May
Albatross


Has a tendency to have a mind that wanders, but when in search of a particular goal, will travel great lengths to achieve it. Occasionally, the albatross may become caught up in things it shouldn't when not seeing clearly enough.

13 May - 9 June
Dove


Peace-loving by nature, doves will bill and coo about things close to their heart. They enjoy a fulfilling love-life and rarely fail to satisfy. They are also patient, adaptable and personable. Their lack of aggression sometimes makes them the victim of more predatory characters.

10 June- 7 July
Eagle


A well-respected figure which has excellent visionary qualities. Eagles will truck no nonsense and will fix opponents with a powerful stare. They have the power to rise above the trivial aspects of humanity, and are highly talented.

8 July- 4 August
Nightingale


More often heard before being seen, nightingales always have something to say for themselves. They are however very much in tune with their partners. Their unimpressive exterior hides a personality that is just waiting to burst out.

5 August - 1 Sept
Kingfisher


Another flamboyant and colorful character that is always exciting to encounter. They rush around at great speed and have a close spiritual affinity with water. They have a sharp and perceptive head on them, but can make them impetuous enough to dive in where others would fear to go.

2 Sept - 29 Sept
Swan


The swan is a complex character. While appearing on the surface as a calm and relaxed individual, underneath they are working hard to keep up with the pace of modern life. If provoked their natural graceful demeanor can give way to a violent temper which puts them in a flap. They are definitely someone to have on your side.

30 Sept - 27 Oct
Woodpecker


A tough, hard-working character with plenty of stamina. Has no problem drumming up support for their ideas, no matter how wacky they seem. With a lateral-thinking mind they are skilled at dissecting problems and seeing the wood for the trees. However, with their noisy and exuberant lifestyle, you might not want to have one as a neighbor.

28 Oct - 24 Nov
Kestrel


A sharp brain helps kestrel people hover from one subject to another without losing concentration. They focus on their life's goal with a single-minded focus, not flustered by what is going on around them. A confidence in their own ability helps them to soar to heights others may only dream of.

25 Nov - 23 Dec
Raven


Always impressive, raven people are a tower of strength. They are more intelligent than their peers and are adept problem-solvers. They enjoy challenges are stimulated by wild and exposed places.

24 Dec - 20 Jan
Heron


Heron people are deceptive. Although they may be solitary individuals for much of the time, they nevertheless have a need to settle in busy communities where they know everyone else. They may get bogged down as they wade the course of life, but have broad enough shoulders to cope with weighty issues. But their insecure nature often leads them to fish for compliments.


So hope you all enjoyed that!! Hope it told you a lot about your selves. Winter is definitely coming as it keeps getting colder here. Have been buzy at my new job only been here now 2 weeks, it has gone by quickly, very quickly. Well u can go and check out a blog that I like at:
http://www.nortynadz.blogspot.com & http://postsecret.blogspot.com enjoy!!
But back to work now and all of you behave urselves hey!!
Gotta go
Ciao
Silver :P

How 2 be happy and other stuff!!!

Hey all,
I saw this and thought it was interesting and good to know….so here it is:


Ten Interpretations to a Happier Life

Stress affects all of us and can show its manifestations in various forms. We cannot avoid it altogether, but what we can do is follow some of these hints to reduce stress from our lives. Here is a list of ten quotations and how we can interpret these to experience a happier and stress free tomorrow.

1) Cry a river; build a bridge; get over it.
Let go of past failures, sadness and people whom we remember but who no longer care for us. This sounds so easy but its easier said than done. We all have gone through our share of heartaches and sadness. But when we constantly remember the pain and suffering we had endured, we are allowing that sadness to gain an upper hand over us. What we must realize is that what has happened has happened. Its over and done with. People change and times change. Moving on in life is very difficult but its the first constructive step to a better you.

2) Everything happens in its own time.
There are things that we do and expect to be rewarded for which does not happen. In offices, there might be a promotion that we might have wanted, a high score on a test, or a job offer that we were sure that was to be given to us that never worked out. At such times we lose perspective and blame our luck and become despondent. We need to realize that there is a time for everything that happens in our lives. And when the appropriate time comes, things will start working the way they were supposed to work.

3) You are the only person who can make yourself happy.
Think of "your" happiness, too, and be kind to yourself. In life, all of us have goals and ambitions. But in the pursuit of those goals, we lose sight of the bigger picture that we are doing these things to make ourselves happy. This is seen especially in the case of mothers who are doing so many things for their kids and family that they don’t remember when the last time was that they did something for their own happiness.
It happens to all of us. Be gentler with yourself. Make yourself happy, and that can be done in so many ways. Treat yourself to some ice cream, buy a book that you were dying to read, spend a day lolling in the bed doing nothing. We deserve it and so do our bodies.

4) Laughter is the best tranquilizer with no side effects.
Laugh each and every day of your life. Humorous situations happen to us every single day. Whether you choose to enjoy the moment or not is your decision. There are so many excuses in our day-to-day life to have a good laugh. All we need to do is just look at the lighter side of life and enjoy the moment. When you laugh, don’t think whether people are watching you or how much you laugh. It’s their problem that they cannot find the humor in the situation that you have found.

5) Happiness is a journey, not a destination.
As we make our journey through life, we have so many things to savor and experience. There is no such thing as instant happiness or happiness that can be found somewhere. Live your life each day, the same way you would climb a mountain. An occasional glance towards the summit keeps the goal in mind, but many beautiful scenes are to be observed from each new vantage point.

6) Do today what others won't so you can live tomorrow like others can’t?
So many times we are faced with duties and work that we are not happy doing or performing. In those times, instead of hating or shirking from that work, we can try and make use of the thought that somehow, whatever we are doing will prove beneficial to us one day or another. Maybe the results won’t be seen tomorrow, but surely we will benefit because we did something that no one was willing to do. An example would be the people who started companies which are million dollar establishments today. They dared to venture and put their money in something that their colleagues would not have been willing to do, and today their work is paying off rich dividends.

7) It is never too late to be what you might have become.
There are several factors that cause us to end up doing the work we do. Many of us, at some point of time, would have definitely wanted to make a career change and thought that it's too late to do it. But the truth is it's never too late. You can start doing whatever we want to do because it's your life and your decisions. Think of the people who attend college in their late 60’s and 70’s because they always wanted to do it. Such people are the ones who truly believe in this adage.

8) Treasure the love you receive; it will survive long after your gold and good health have vanished.
We always seem to cherish our material possessions more than we should. But life can take a lot more from us. Today we might have good health, family love and a good home to go back to. What we forget is that there are so many calamities that can take away all our comforts, but love is something that can never be taken away. We need to be more demonstrative of our love towards others and treat our loved ones with more kindness and affection.

9) The journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step.
Any huge task that needs to be done seems very daunting at first. But if we analyze the task carefully, and do it step-by-step, we will find that things get resolved very quickly and easily. But we need to be bold enough to take the first small step. Once that is done, we just need to proceed with additional small steps towards our goal.

10) Always have something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.
These three things are what will keep the flame burning within all of us. Something to do will keep us busy, something to love will keep us motivated and something to hope for will take us faster towards our goal.


Well, it has been extremely cold today.
I tried to make chicken lasagne last night, it came out all rite but just not how it should be anyway tasted cool.
Still buzy at my new job but goin ok now, very buzy but I love been buzy so that’s alrite I guess….
But back to work now and all of you behave urselves hey!!
Gotta go
Ciao
Silver :P

Joke, Work and Movies!

Hey all,

Wow it’s Monday already and it’s work, work and more work lol
Anyway a joke to help brighten your day :P

A young couple was in their honeymoon suite on their wedding night. As they undressed for bed, the husband, who was a big burly bruiser, tossed his pants to his bride and said, "Here, put these on."
She put them on and the waist was twice the size of her body. "I can't wear your pants," she said.
"That's right and don't forget it," said the husband. "I'm the man in this family."
With that, she flipped him her panties and said, "Try these on." He tried them on and found he could only get them on as far as his kneecaps.
He said, "Hell, I can't get into your pants."
She said, "That's right, and that's the way it's going to be until your damn attitude changes!"

Well, it’s pretty windy this side I think the August winds have come a bit early anyway, watched a movie called ‘Before Sunset’ and believe me this is the worst movie one can c trust me. All they did was talk throughout the whole movie but besides that nothing much. So what’s ur guys worst movie??? Let me know.
Watched ‘Blade Trinity’ again now that’s what you call action. Your favourite, oh come on your must have a favourite. At the moment I’m reading ‘Airframe’ by Michael Crichton (sowwy not spelled correctly don’t have the book on hand at the mo) It’s a book loaded with action and info about aeroplanes. Most would probably enjoy this book.

Chat to you all later
Chow
Silver:P

Work, Cat and other useless info!!

Hello all,

Another day in my life. Another week yah!! Weekend now hallelujah…. Friend is in JHB. I’m still working hard but then again who isn’t. 2 more hours of work only 2 go, thank goodness. I have to pick up my mother b4 goin’ home and then I’m definitely gonna have a couple hours sleep coz I feel like I haven’t slept in like 4 days, even though I have. Believe me I love my sleep. My sister some how managed to dry bath (don’t ask) my cat and brush all the knots out without getting too badly hurt. lol :P
My 2 cousins are down from the UK. My other cousin has gone back to the UK with her son.
Here's a joke for you:

Snappy Answer #1
A stewardess was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a
man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket, and he opened his
coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat she said, "Sir, I need to
see your ticket, not your stub."
Snappy Answer #2
A lady was picking through the frozen chickens at the supermarket, but
Couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked the shelf
stacker, "Do these chickens get any bigger?"
He replied, "No, they're dead."
Snappy Answer #3
The policeman got out of his car and the lad who was stopped for
speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day,"
the policeman said.
The lad replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I
could." When the policeman finally stopped laughing, he sent the lad on
his way without a ticket.
Snappy Answer #4
A lorry driver was driving along. A sign comes up that reads "low bridge
ahead." Before he knows it the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets
stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police
car comes up. The policeman gets out of his car and walks around to the
lorry driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck?"
The lorry driver says, "No mate, I was delivering this bridge and ran
out of petrol."
And finally #5, THE TEACHER Snappy Answer OF THE YEAR
A university lecturer reminds her students of tomorrow's final exam.
"Now, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I
might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness,
or a death in your immediate family but that's it, no other excuses
whatsoever!" A smart-arse bloke in the back of the room raised his hand
and asks,
"What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and
utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class does its best to stifle their
laughter.
When silence is restored,
the lecturer smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and
sweetly says, "Well, I suppose you'd have to write the exam with your
other hand."

SA KIDS ESSAY ON A CROCODILE !
This is a real life exam answer of a grade 5 (Std 3) primary school
pupil's 2nd term exam.
Write an essay on the following: "What is a crocodile?" Use block
letters and write legibly.
Name: Christiaan Janse van Vuuren
Date: Maandag 22/05/2004
Answer:
The crokodile is a specially built so long because the flatter the
better swimmer. At the front of the crokodile is the head. The head
exists almost only of teeth. Behind the crokodile the tail grows.
Between the head and the tail is the crokodile. A crokodile without a
tail is called a rotweiler. A crokodiles body is covered with handbag
material. He can throw his tail off if he gets a fright but it doesn't
happen much because a crokodile is scared of nothing.
A crokodile stays under the water because if you were so ugly, you
would also stay under the water. It is good that a crokodile stays under
the water because a person gets such a big fright if a crocodile catches
you that he first has to rinse you off before he can eat you.
A crokodile isn't hardly as dangerous as people say he is, except if he
catches you. The longer he bites you, the more it hurts. Very old
crokodiles only suck people and buck that they catch dead.
If you eat him, he is a crokosatie. A crokodile did not learn to swim
with his arms so he uses his tail. The little brother of a crocodile is
a lizard. The slow sister of the crokodile is a chamelon. The gay
brother of the crokodile is a dafodil. And the crokodil also has a dead
brother the frikadel.
Ciao
Silver:P

New Job, Healing and mom's Bday!

Hi there all,
My apologies for not writing sooner but you people surely know how crazy it can get when you have a new job. And have too learn everything from scratch.
But don’t worry, I will try to write during the week.
But the job is going cool so far and I am learning loads of new things and am doing different things. Like starting a database and query applications. Although I do miss the other staff a hech of a lot but I still see them around from time to time.
I am feeling a lot better since the surgery except now that I have sores all over my back, face, legs and arms. Put this way though I am in the healing process, which is good! My mom’s bday went well. Took her to supper and movies, it was fine and good.
Gotta go
Ciao,
Silver :P