Work, Cat and other useless info!!

Hello all,

Another day in my life. Another week yah!! Weekend now hallelujah…. Friend is in JHB. I’m still working hard but then again who isn’t. 2 more hours of work only 2 go, thank goodness. I have to pick up my mother b4 goin’ home and then I’m definitely gonna have a couple hours sleep coz I feel like I haven’t slept in like 4 days, even though I have. Believe me I love my sleep. My sister some how managed to dry bath (don’t ask) my cat and brush all the knots out without getting too badly hurt. lol :P
My 2 cousins are down from the UK. My other cousin has gone back to the UK with her son.
Here's a joke for you:

Snappy Answer #1
A stewardess was stationed at the departure gate to check tickets. As a
man approached, she extended her hand for the ticket, and he opened his
coat and flashed her. Without missing a beat she said, "Sir, I need to
see your ticket, not your stub."
Snappy Answer #2
A lady was picking through the frozen chickens at the supermarket, but
Couldn't find one big enough for her family. She asked the shelf
stacker, "Do these chickens get any bigger?"
He replied, "No, they're dead."
Snappy Answer #3
The policeman got out of his car and the lad who was stopped for
speeding rolled down his window. "I've been waiting for you all day,"
the policeman said.
The lad replied, "Yeah, well I got here as fast as I
could." When the policeman finally stopped laughing, he sent the lad on
his way without a ticket.
Snappy Answer #4
A lorry driver was driving along. A sign comes up that reads "low bridge
ahead." Before he knows it the bridge is right ahead of him and he gets
stuck under the bridge. Cars are backed up for miles. Finally, a police
car comes up. The policeman gets out of his car and walks around to the
lorry driver, puts his hands on his hips and says, "Got stuck?"
The lorry driver says, "No mate, I was delivering this bridge and ran
out of petrol."
And finally #5, THE TEACHER Snappy Answer OF THE YEAR
A university lecturer reminds her students of tomorrow's final exam.
"Now, I won't tolerate any excuses for you not being here tomorrow. I
might consider a nuclear attack or a serious personal injury or illness,
or a death in your immediate family but that's it, no other excuses
whatsoever!" A smart-arse bloke in the back of the room raised his hand
and asks,
"What would you say if tomorrow I said I was suffering from complete and
utter sexual exhaustion?" The entire class does its best to stifle their
laughter.
When silence is restored,
the lecturer smiles sympathetically at the student, shakes her head, and
sweetly says, "Well, I suppose you'd have to write the exam with your
other hand."

SA KIDS ESSAY ON A CROCODILE !
This is a real life exam answer of a grade 5 (Std 3) primary school
pupil's 2nd term exam.
Write an essay on the following: "What is a crocodile?" Use block
letters and write legibly.
Name: Christiaan Janse van Vuuren
Date: Maandag 22/05/2004
Answer:
The crokodile is a specially built so long because the flatter the
better swimmer. At the front of the crokodile is the head. The head
exists almost only of teeth. Behind the crokodile the tail grows.
Between the head and the tail is the crokodile. A crokodile without a
tail is called a rotweiler. A crokodiles body is covered with handbag
material. He can throw his tail off if he gets a fright but it doesn't
happen much because a crokodile is scared of nothing.
A crokodile stays under the water because if you were so ugly, you
would also stay under the water. It is good that a crokodile stays under
the water because a person gets such a big fright if a crocodile catches
you that he first has to rinse you off before he can eat you.
A crokodile isn't hardly as dangerous as people say he is, except if he
catches you. The longer he bites you, the more it hurts. Very old
crokodiles only suck people and buck that they catch dead.
If you eat him, he is a crokosatie. A crokodile did not learn to swim
with his arms so he uses his tail. The little brother of a crocodile is
a lizard. The slow sister of the crokodile is a chamelon. The gay
brother of the crokodile is a dafodil. And the crokodil also has a dead
brother the frikadel.
Ciao
Silver:P