News (Not much) and a story

Hello,

I don’t have much news except that I saw my aunt, uncle and {cousin(who came back from the USA) } Watched 7th Heaven (Barry Watson, Jessica Biel, Mackensie Rosman, George Stults and David Gallagher) at 19:30 SABC 2 (SA) and darn it, I hate it when a programme is continued. Smallville (Tom Welling Stars)today same time, same station (SA). Weather is nice, sun is shining and not so much wind. I have been buzy today as well so that’s good.

Have a story for you:
Story: This is my wish for you...KEEP YOUR DREAM ALIVE!!!!!
The first day of school our professor introduced himself and challenged
us to get to know someone we didn't already know. I stood up to look
around when a gentle hand touched my shoulder.
I turned around to find a wrinkled, little old lady beaming up at me
with a smile that lit up her entire being.
She said, "Hi handsome. My name is Rose. I'm eighty-seven years old. Can
I give you a hug?"
I laughed and enthusiastically responded, "Of course you may!" and she
gave me a giant squeeze.
"Why are you in college at such a young, innocent age?" I asked.
She jokingly replied, "I'm here to meet a rich husband, get married, and
have a couple of kids..."
"No seriously," I asked. I was curious what may have motivated her to be
taking on this challenge at her age.
"I always dreamed of having a college education and now I'm getting
one!" she told me.
After class we walked to the student union building and shared a
chocolate milkshake.
We became instant friends. Every day for the next three months we would
leave class together and talk nonstop. I was always mesmerized listening
to this "time machine" as she shared her wisdom and experience with me.
Over the course of the year, Rose became a campus icon and she easily
made friends wherever she went. She loved to dress up and she reveled in
the attention bestowed upon her from the other students. She was living
it up.
At the end of the semester we invited Rose to speak at our football
banquet. I'll never forget what she taught us. She was introduced and
stepped up to the podium. As she began to deliver her prepared speech,
she dropped her three by five cards on the floor.
Frustrated and a little embarrassed she leaned into the microphone and
simply said, "I'm sorry I'm so jittery. I gave up beer for Lent and this
whiskey is killing me! I'll never get my speech back in order so let me
just tell you what I know."
As we laughed she cleared her throat and began, "We do not stop playing
because we are old; we grow old because we stop playing. There are only
four secrets to staying young, being happy, and achieving success. You
have to laugh and find humor every day. You've got to have a dream. When
you lose your dreams, you die. We have so many people walking around who
are dead and don't even know it! There is a huge difference between
growing older and growing up. If you are nineteen years old and lie in
bed for one full year and don't do one productive thing, you will turn
twenty years old. If I am eighty-seven years old and stay in bed for a
year and never do anything I will turn eighty-eight. Anybody can grow
older. That doesn't take any talent or ability. The idea is to grow up
by always finding opportunity in change. Have no regrets. The elderly
usually don't have regrets for what we did, but rather for things we did
not do. The only people who fear death are those with regrets."
She concluded her speech by courageously singing "The Rose."
She challenged each of us to study the lyrics and live them out in our
daily lives.
At the year's end Rose finished the college degree she had begun all
those years ago.
One week after graduation Rose died peacefully in her sleep. Over two
thousand college students attended her funeral in tribute to the
wonderful woman who taught by example that it's never too late to be
all you can possibly be.
When you finish reading this, please send this peaceful word of advice
to your friends and family, they'll really enjoy it!
These words have been passed along in loving memory of ROSE.
REMEMBER, GROWING OLDER IS MANDATORY. GROWING UP IS OPTIONAL. We make a
Living by what we get, We make a Life by what we give.
God promises a safe landing, not a calm passage. If God brings you to
it, He will bring you through it.


Anyway ciao for now
Write more tomorrow
Ciao
Silver
:P

Stuff, Marriage and its Tuesday!!!

Hello all,
Read the below and be sure to enjoy them.

Joke: SHOPPING AT WOOLIES (South African)
One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Joe says to Mike behind him, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor.""Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies,"there's a diagnostic computer down at Woolworth's. Just give it aurine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs R20.00 - a lot quicker andcheaper than a doctor." So Joe deposits urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Woolies. He deposits R20.00, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout :"You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks. Thank you for shopping @ Woolies."That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Joebegan wondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tapwater, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife anddaughter and a sperm sample for good measure. Joe hurries back toWoolies, eager to check the results. He deposits R20.00, pours in hisconcoction and waits for the results.The computer prints out the following :1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. (Aisle 9) 2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo. (Aisle7) 3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab. 4. Your wife is pregnant, Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. (1stFloor)5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never getbetter.Thank you for shopping @ Woolies.

INFO: HEAR WHAT OPRAH HAD TO SAY ABOUT MEN (USA)
> If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away.
> If he doesn't want you, nothing can make him stay.
> Stop making excuses for a man and his behaviour.
> Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
> Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that's not meant to
> be.
> Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what
> makes
> you truly happy.
> If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you
> deserve
> then heck no, you can't "be friends".
> A friend wouldn't mistreat a friend.
> Don't settle.
> If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is. Don't
> stay because you think "it will get better."
> You'll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not
> better.
> The only person you can control in a relationship is you.
> Avoid men who've got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women.
> He didn't marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you
> any
> differently?
> Always have your own set of friends separate from his.
> Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you,
> speak
> up.
> Never let a man know everything.* He will use it against you later.
> You cannot change a man's behaviour.* Change comes from within.
> Don't EVER make him feel he is more important than you are... even if he
> has
> more education or in a better job.
> Do not make him into a quasi-god.
> He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
> Never let a man define who you are.
> Never borrow someone else's man.
> If he cheated with you, he'll cheat on you.
> A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
> All men are NOT dogs.
> You should not be the one doing all the bending...compromise is two way
> street.
> You need time to heal between relationships...there is nothing cute
> about
> baggage... deal with your issues before pursuing a new relationship
> You should never look for someone to COMPLETE you...a relationship
> consists
> of two WHOLE individuals...look for someone complimentary...not
> supplementary.
> Dating is fun...even if he doesn't turn out to be Mr. Right.
> Make him miss you sometimes...when a man always know where you are, and
> you're always readily available to him - he takes it for granted.
> Never move into his mother's house. Never co-sign for a man.
> Don't fully commit to a man who doesn't give you everything that you
> need.*
> Keep him in your radar but get to know others.
> Share this with other women and men (just so they know)... You'll make
> someone smile, another rethink her choices, and another woman prepare.
> They say it takes a minute to find a special person,
> an hour to appreciate them, a day to love them and
> an entire lifetime to forget them.

Joke: Sayings
He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
Everyone has a photographic memory. Some don't have film.
A day without sunshine is like... night.
On the other hand, you have different fingers.
Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.
When the chips are down, the buffalo is empty.
Seen it all, done it all, can't remember most of it.
Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.
I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.
You have the right to remain silent. Anything you say will be misquoted then used against you.
I wonder how much deeper the ocean would be without sponges.
Honk if you love peace and quiet.
Despite the cost of living, have you noticed how it remains so popular?
Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.
It is hard to understand how a cemetery raised its burial cost and blamed it on the cost of living.
Just remember...if the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.
The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.
It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end to end, someone would be stupid enough to try and pass them.
You can't have everything, where would you put it?
Latest survey shows that 3 out of 4 people make up 75% of the world's population.
The things that come to those who wait are usually the things left by those who got there first.
Everybody lies, but it doesn't matter since nobody listens.
I wished the buck stopped here, as I could use a few.
I started out with nothing, and I still have most of it.
Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

Story: Special Grocery List
Louise Redden, a poorly dressed lady with a look of defeat on her face, walked into a grocery store.She approached the owner of the store in a most humble manner and asked if he would let her charge a few groceries.She softly explained that her husband was very ill and unable to work, they had seven children and they needed food.John Longhouse, the grocer, scoffed at her and requested that she leave his store at once.Visualizing the family needs, she said: "Please, sir! I will bring you the money just assoon as I can."John told her he could not give her credit, since she did not have a charge account at his store.Standing beside the counter was a customer who overheard the conversation between the two. The customer walked forward and told the grocer that he would stand good for whatever she needed for her family.The grocer said in a very reluctant voice, "Do you have a grocery list?"Louise replied, "Yes sir." "O.K" he said, "put your grocery list on the scales and whatever your grocery list weighs, I will give you that amount ingroceries."Louise, hesitated a moment with a bowed head, then she reached into her purse and took out a piece of paper and scribbled something on it. She then laid the piece of paper on the scale carefully with her head still bowed.The eyes of the grocer and the customer showed amazement when the scales went down and stayed down.The grocer, staring at the scales, turned slowly to the customer and said begrudgingly, "I can't believe it."The customer smiled and the grocer started putting the groceries on the other side of the scales. The scale did not balance so he continued to put more and more groceries on them until the scales would hold no more.The grocer stood there in utter disgust. Finally, he grabbed the piece of paper from the scales and looked at it with greater amazement.It was not a grocery list, it was a prayer, which said:"Dear Lord, you know my needs and I am leaving this in your hands."The grocer gave her the groceries that he had gathered and stood in stunned silence.Louise thanked him and left the store.The other customer handed a fifty-dollar bill to the grocer and said;"It was worth every penny of it .. Only God Knows how much a prayer weighs."

Well I do hope that u did enjoy those but work calls once again…My car got fixed thank Goodness that’s done… something to do with leaking break fluid which by the way is neva a good thing ur breaks suddenly just don’t work anymore but its fixed now!!! My uncle is getting married and he didn’t even invite us to go and I don’t know what the matter is with him. And I don’t like his wife-to be either all though they have been living together for 8 or so years. I don’t know why I am getting so worked up over it but it is 1 of those special occasions and I should be there but he doesn’t care much about that and we not that close anyway actually I hardly know the man but besides that he is my uncle and I should be there. He decided 2 get married in 2 months just like that!! Any way I hope he is happy!
Sun is shining that’s a good thing and it is the last month of Winter next month which is also a good thing.
I’ll write more tomorrow
Behave hey and don’t work 2 hard!
Silver
:P

Hey Friday at long last!!

Hello all,

Sorry neva wrote yesterday had car problems so was buzy running arond doin all that lot.

Anyway got some stuff for you to read as always:

Happiness keeps You Sweet,
Trials keep You Strong,
Sorrows keep You Human,
Failures keeps You Humble,
Success keeps You Glowing,
But Only God keeps You Going! You are so special!
"Today is world's online buddy day.

THIS SAYS IT ALL:
Time passes.Life happens.Distance separates.Children grow up.Jobs come and go.Love waxes and wanes.Men don't call when they say they will.Hearts break.Parents die.Colleagues forget favors.Careers end.BUT...........Girlfriends are there, no matter how much time and howmany miles are between you.A girlfriend is never farther away than needing her canreach.When you have to walk that lonesome valley and you have to walk it by yourself, your girlfriends will be on the valley's rim, cheering you on, praying for you, pulling for you, intervening on your behalf, and waiting with open arms at the valley's end. Sometimes, they will even break the rules and walk beside you. Or come in and carry you out.

SA JOKE:
One day, Jimmy was walking down Voortrekker Road when he checked hischina, Kallie, driving a brand new Hilux . Kallie pulled up to him withawide grin. He tunes Kallie: "jislike Kallie, where'd you get thatbakkie,looks lekke man?""Sannie gave it to me" Kallie charfs."She gave it to you! I knew she kind of smaaked you, but a newbakkie???""Well, Jimmy, let me charf you what happened: We were driving out onthegravel road, in the middle of nowhere. Sannie pulled off the road, putthebakkie in 4-wheel drive, and headed into the bushes.She parked the bakkie, jumped out, threw off all her clothes andschemes: "Kallie, take whatever you want ''. I swear, one time, broer!...So I took the bakkie".."Kallie, you're blerrie clever, man! Those clothes would never havefittedyou!!!


Enjoy ur weekend
Ciao
Sillver
:P

Middle of the week, Info and HELLO People!!!!!

Hello People,

Sorry i havent written in a while have been extremelly buzy!! I dont know what else to say really except that i am glad that it is Wednesday and the MIddle of the week. But now for some info ..... Enjoy!!! :)

Star Signs : Drinking

Aries
Impulsive Aries people like to party and sometimes don't know when to call it a night. Their competitive streak makes them prone to closing time shot contests. They're sloppy, fun drunks, and they get mighty flirty after a couple tipples. Getting Aries people drunk is a good way to get what you want out of them, should other methods fail. Aries can become bellicose when blotto, but they will assume that whatever happened should be forgiven (if not forgotten) by sunrise. They can be counted on to do the same for you -- so long as you haven't gone and done anything really horrible to them last night, you sneaky Gemini.

Taurus
Taurus prefers to drink at a leisurely pace, aiming for a mellow glow rather than a full on zonk. Since a truly intoxicated Taurus is a one-person stampede, the kind of bull-in-a-china-shop inebriate who spills red wine on white carpets and tells fart jokes to employers, the preference for wining and dining (or Bud and buddies) to body shots and barfing is quite fortunate for the rest of us. This is not to say that the Bull is by any means a teetotaler -- god, no. A squiffy Taurus will get, er, gregarious (full of loudmouth soup, some would say) and is extremely amusing to drag to a karaoke bar when intoxicated.

Gemini
Gemini’s can drink without changing their behavior much -- they're so naturally chatty and short-attention-spanned that it's just hard to tell sometimes. They can amaze you by conversing with finesse and allusions, then doing something to belie an extremely advanced state of intoxication, like puking in your shoe. Gemini’s possess the magic ability to flirt successfully (and uninfuriatingly, which is very tricky) with several people at once. They like to order different cocktails every round -- repetition is boring -- and may create a theme (like yellow drinks: beer, sauvignon blanc and limoncello) for their own amusement.

Cancer
Cancer is a comfort drinker -- and an extra wine with dinner or an after-work beer or six can be extra comforting, can't it, Cancer darling? Like fellow water signs Scorpio and Pisces, Crabs must guard against lushery. Cancers are brilliant at ferreting out secret parties and insinuating themselves on VIP lists -- and, in true Hollywood style, Cancers are never really drunk; instead, they get "tired and emotional" (read: weepy when lubricated). But there's nothing better than swapping stories (and spit) over a few bottles of inky red wine with your favorite Cancer. Even your second-favorite Cancer will do. The sign also rules the flavor vanilla, and you'd be adored if you served up vanilla vodka and soda.

Leo
Leo likes to drink and dance -- they're often fabulous dancers, and usually pretty good drinkers as well, losing their commanding dignity and turning kittenish. Of course, they're quite aware they're darling -- Leos will be Leos, after all. They generally know their limit, probably because they loathe losing self-control. When they get over-refreshed, expect flirting to ensue -- and perhaps not with the one what brung them. But Leo's not the type to break rules even when drunk, so just try to ignore it (try harder, Cancer) and expect a sheepish (and hung over) Lion to make it up to you the next day.

Virgo
Cerebral Virgos are compelled to impose order onto their bender. Their famously fussy quest for purity could lead to drinking less than other signs, sure -- but it could also lead to drinking booze neat, to sucking down organic wine or just to brand loyalty. They rarely get fully shellacked -- but, oh, when they do! Virgo's controlled by the intellect, but there's an unbridled beast lurking within, and they let it loose when walloped. It's dead sexy (and surprisingly unsloppy). As one Virgo friend used to declare, "I'm going to drink myself into a low level of intelligence tonight." A toast to the subgenius IQ!

Libra
"I'm jusht a social drinker," slurs Libra, "it's jusht that I'm so damn social?" Libra loves nothing more than to party, mingle and relate to everyone. Whether dipped in favor of Good Libra (with Insta-Friend device set to "on") or heavier on the Evil Libra side (they are little instigators when bored), the Scales can really work a room. Charming as they are, Libras are notoriously lacking in self-control, however, which can get them into all sorts of trouble -- including wearing their wobbly boots waaaay too early in the evening, flirting with their best friend's beau or even blacking out the night’s events entirely. Oops!

Scorpio
Don't ever tell Scorpios they've had enough, for they'll smirk at you and quietly but intentionally keep tippling till they're hog whimpering drunk, out of 100-proof spite. Scorpios like to drink, and screw you if you have a problem with that. Most of them see the sauce as something to savor in itself, and not as a personality-altering tool -- though if depressed, self-loathing Scorps seek total obliteration. But generally, they're fascinating drinking pals, brilliant conversationalists and dizzying flirts. They also remember everything -- especially what you did when you were blitzed. Only drink with a Scorpio who likes you.

Sagittarus
In vino veritas -- and, for Sagittarius, in booze blurtiness:
When buttered, they'll spill all your secrets and many of their own. Tactlessness aside, Sagittarius is just plain fun to drink with. This is a sign of serious partying (what else would you expect from the sign of Sinatra, Keith Richards, the Bush twins and Anna Nicole Smith?). They're the people who chat up everyone in the room, then persuade the entire crowd to travel somewhere else -- like a nightclub, or a playground, or Cancun. Good-natured hijinks are sure to ensue (including a high possibility of loopy groping; spontaneous Sag is a brilliant booty call).

Capricorn
Capricorn is usually described as practical, steadfast, money-hungry and status-thirsty -- no wonder they get left off the astrological cocktail-party list. But this is the sign of David Bowie and Annie Lennox, not to mention Elvis. Capricorn is the true rock star: independent, powerful and seriously charismatic, not too eager to please. And if they make money being themselves, who are you to quibble? But just like most rock stars, they're either totally on or totally off, and they generally need a little social lubricant to loosen up and enjoy the after party, especially if they can hook up with a cute groupie.

Aquarius
Aquarius and drinking don't go together that well (except for water, that is). They have an innate tendency toward know-it-allism, and if they get an idea while sizzled, they're more stubborn than a stain or a stone. If they're throwing a party or organizing an outing, however, they're too preoccupied with their duties to get combative -- and they make perfectly charming drunks in that case. Fortunately, they're usually capital drink-nursers. They also make the best-designated drivers (if you can get them before they start raising their wrist): Aquarius is fascinated by drunken people and capable of holding interesting conversations with soused strangers while sober.

Pisces
If you're a Pisces, you've probably already heard that you share a sign -- and an addictive personality -- with Liz Taylor, Liza Minelli and Kurt Cobain. Not only do Pisces like to lose themselves in the dreamy, out-there feeling that only hooch can give, but they build up a mighty tolerance fast. Who needs an expensive date like that? On the other hand, they’re fabulously enchanting partners, whether in conversation or in crime. With the right Pisces, you can start out sharing a pitcher of margaritas and wind up in bed together for days. The phrase "addictive personality" can be read two ways, you know.

Anyway so more info for you : this time on dating and how to kiss (:LOL :)

http://gratefuldating.blogspot.com/2005/07/how-to-kiss.html

http://gratefuldating.blogspot.com/2005/01/how-to-date.html

Hope that as always my info helps!!! (somehow......even if it just brightens up ur day and by the way it is hectally overcast here!) Wow i dont know where the time has gone this week i mean i woke up on Monday and it is already the end of Wednesday except to those who are in a different timeline of course. Before we know it, it will be Christmas and time just seems to be moving faster and faster.
But neva mind technology i hope will catch up with what time we have left. Now u all betta behave urselves and keep well..... Hope those of you that are having Summer now are enjoying it and not complaining to much, because i am missing it completely.
If u want to comment to me privately here's my e-mail: sillverChick001@yahoo.com
Gotta go now, work to do as usual
Ciao 4 now
Silver
:P

"Tru Calling", Friday and jokes!!

Hello people,
Well it’s Friday and the weather’s beautiful so that’s a good thing, rite!Some jokes and info for you below as always. Guess what is back on MNET (SA) “Tru Calling” and it will only be on for 6 or 7 weeks so if you guys want to watch it tune in now, Thursdays at 5pm. It’s Saturday tomorrow so it will be Hear no work, speak no work and definetly see no work. But … all to soon it will be Monday and back to work again. For now though enjoy your weekend and try not to get too nawty and don’t party 2 hard but just relax!!! :P

Joke: A Faithful WifeA woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day.One day, when he came to, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what? You have been with me through all the bad times.When I got fired, you were there to support me.When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side... You know what?" "What dear?", she gently asked, smiling as herheart began to fill with warmth. "I think you're bad luck."
Info:Balannce Sheet Of LifeOur Birth is our Opening BalanceOur Death is our Closing BalanceOur Prejudiced Views are our LiabilitiesOur Creative Ideas are our AssetsHeart is our Current AssetSoul is our Fixed AssetBrain is our Fixed DepositThinking is our Current AccountAchievements are our CapitalCharacter & Morals, our Stock-in-tradeFriends are our General ReservesValues & Behaviour are our Goodwill Patience is our Interest EarnedLove is our DividendChildren are our Bonus IssuesEducation is Brands / PatentsKnowledge is our InvestmentExperience is our Premium AccountThe Aim is to Tally the Balance Sheet Accurately.The Goal is to get the Best Presented Accounts Award. Some very Good and Very bad things The most destructive habit......................WorryThe greatest Joy...............................GivingThe greatest loss................Loss of selfrespectThe most satisfying work...............Helping othersThe ugliest personality trait.............SelfishnessThe most endangered species.........Dedicated leadersOur greatest natural resource...............Our youthThe greatest "shot in the arm"..........EncouragementThe greatest problem to overcome.................FearThe most effective sleeping pill........Peace of mind The most crippling failure disease............ExcusesThe most powerful force in life..................LoveThe most dangerous pariah..................A gossiperThe world's most incredible computer........The brainThe worst thing to be without................... HopeThe deadliest weapon.......................The tongueThe two most powerfilled words..............."I Can"The greatest asset..............................FaithThe most worthless emotion..................SelfpityThe most beautiful attire......................SMILE!The most prized possession................IntegrityThe most powerful channel of communication.....PrayerThe most contagious spirit.................EnthusiasmThe most important thing in life..................Almighty GOD Everyone needs this list to live byGreat opportunities to help others seldom come, but small ones surround us every day.
Joke: DearA hunter kills a deer and brings it home. He decides to clean and servethe deermeat for supper. He knows his kids are fussy eaters, and won't eat it ifthey knowwhat it is so he doesn't tell them.>His little boy, Jimmy, keeps asking him, "What's for supper dad?">"You'll see" he replies.>They start eating supper and his daughter keeps asking him what they areeating.>"Ok", says her dad, "Here's a hint. It's what your mother sometimes>calls me.">His daughter screams... "Don't eat it Jimmy! It's an a$$hole!"

You See how to impress girls and guys :
HOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN Compliment her, respect her, honor her, cuddle her, kiss her, caress her, love her, stroke her, tease her, comfort her, protect her, hug her, hold her, spend money on her, wine and dine her, buy things for her, listen to her, care for her, stand by her, support her, hold her, go to the ends of the Earth for her.
HOW TO IMPRESS A MAN Show up naked. Bring food.

So gotta go and get some work done!!Enjoy ur weekend ans I will write to you all on Monday
Ciao
Silver :P

Hello, Info, Signs And sayings

Hello all
Hope you are all well!

Info: 1-16
> 1.. Some people kiss with their eyes closed.
Too bad they marry the same way.
> 2.. Smoking helps you lose weight .. one lung at a time!
> 3.. The trouble with being the best man at a
wedding is that you never get to prove it.
4.. Isn't having a smoking section in a restaurant
like having a peeing section in a swimming pool?
5.. I always leave an empty milk carton in the refrigerator
> just in case someone wants their coffee black.
6.. The light at the end of the tunnel is the
headlight of the oncoming train.
7.. My Grandfather is eighty and still doesn't need
> glasses...
> He drinks straight out of the bottle.
8.. Tell a man there are 400 billion stars and he'll
> believe
> you... Tell him a bench has wet paint and he has to touch it.
9.. Behind every great man, there is a
surprised woman.
10..Advertisement: Guitar, for sale, cheap,
no strings attached.
11..Did you hear about the blonde who threw away her weight
> loss video?
Because she noticed that the people on the
> video weren't losing weight either?
12..If Tennis Players get Tennis Elbow...
Do gynecologists get Tunnel vision?
13.."Buffet". A French word that means
"Get up & get it yourself!"
14..I AM in shape... Round is a shape.
15..Sign seen in a bar:
"Those drinking to forget please pay in
> advance."
16..When I read about the evils of drinking...
I gave up reading

Joke:3 men> Three men: a philosopher, a mathematician and an idiot, were out > riding in> the car when it crashed into a tree. Before anyone knows it, the > three men> found themselves standing before the pearly gates of Heaven, where St > Peter> and the Devil were standing nearby.> "Gentlemen," the Devil started, "Due to the fact that Heaven is now> overcrowded, therefore St Peter has agreed to limit the number of > people> entering Heaven. If anyone of you can ask me a question which I don't > know> or cannot answer, then you're worthy enough to go to Heaven; if not, > then> you'll come with me to Hell."> The philosopher then stepped up, "OK, give me the most comprehensive > report> on Socrates' teachings," With a snap of his finger, a stack of paper> appeared next to the Devil. The philosopher read it and concluded it > was> correct. "Then, go to Hell!" With another snap of his finger, the > philsopher> disappeared.> The mathematician then asked, "Give m e the most complicated formula > you c> an ever think of!" With a snap of his finger, another stack of paper> appeared next to the Devil. The mathematician read it and reluctantly > agreed> it was correct. "Then, go to Hell!" With another snap of his finger, > the> mathematician disappeared, too.> The idiot then stepped forward and said, "Bring me a chair!" The Devil> brought forward a chair. "Drill 7 holes on the seat." The Devil did > just> that. The idiot then sat on the chair and let out a very loud fart. > Standing> up, he asked, "Which hole did my fart come out from?"> The Devil inspected the seat and said, "The third hole from the > right."> "Wrong," said the idiot, "it's from my A**HOLE ." And the idiot went to> Heaven.

Beauty is only a light switch away.Perkins Library, Duke University, Durham, NC

If life is a waste of time,and time is a waste of life,then let's all get wasted togetherand have the time of our lives.Armand's Pizza, Washington, DC

Remember, it's not,"How high are you?"it's"Hi, how are you?" Rest stop off Route 81, West Virginia

Fighting for peace is likescrewing for virginity. The Bayou, Baton Rouge, LO

No matter how good she looks,some other guy is sick and tiredof putting up with her sh*t.Men's RoomLinda's Bar and Grill, Chapel Hill, NC

At the feast of egoeveryone leaves hungry. Bentley's House of Coffee and Tea, Tucson, AZ

It's hard to make a comebackwhen you haven't been anywhere.Written in the duston the back of a bus,Wickenburg, AZ

Make love, not war..-Hell, do bothGET MARRIED!Women's restroomThe Filling Station, Bozeman, MT

If voting could really change things,it would be illegal.Revolution BooksNew York, New York.

If pro is opposite of con,then what is the opposite of progress?Congress! Men's Restroom The House of Representatives Washington DC

Express Lane:Five beers or lessSign over one of the urinalsEd Debevic's, Phoenix, AZ

You're too good for him.Sign over mirror in Women's restroomEd Debevic's, Beverly Hills,CA.

No wonder you always go home alone.Sign over mirror in Men's restroom,Ed Debevic's, Beverly Hills,CA

A Woman's Rule of Thumb:If it has tires or testicles,You're going to have trouble with it. Women's restroom Dick's Last Resort, Dallas, TX


I will write more tomorrow
Ciao 4 now!!
Silver
:P

Info, Jokes and "War of the Worlds"

Hello People,
Sorry did not write yesterday I was very buzy and I didn’t even see the time go by.
Watched “War of the Worlds” directed by Steven Spielberg and had actors like Tom Cruise, Tim Robbins, Miranda Otto and Morgan Freeman Narrated. It was a very scientific movie but full of action and very moving. To see how the world would react if it was invaded by aliens.
Now below I have info for you as well as some jokes….enjoy!

Info: FOR THE GARDEN OF YOUR DAILY LIVING, PLANT THREE ROWS OF PEAS:
>1. Peace of mind
>2. Peace of heart
>3. Peace of soul
>PLANT FOUR ROWS OF SQUASH:
>1. Squash gossip
>2. Squash indifference
>3. Squash grumbling
>4. Squash selfishness
>PLANT FOUR ROWS OF LETTUCE:
>1. Lettuce be faithful
>2. Lettuce be kind
>3. Lettuce be patient
>4. Lettuce really love one another
>NO GARDEN IS WITHOUT TURNIPS:
>1. Turnip for meetings
>2. Turnip for service
>3. Turnip to help one another
>TO CONCLUDE OUR GARDEN WE MUST HAVE THYME:
>1. Thyme for each other
>2. Thyme for family
>3. Thyme for friends
>WATER FREELY WITH PATIENCE AND CULTIVATE WITH LOVE. THERE IS MUCH FRUIT IN
>YOUR GARDEN BECAUSE YOU REAP WHAT YOU SOW.

Jokes: CHILDREN AND CHURCH
> A little boy was attending his first wedding. After the service, his
cousin
> asked him, "How many women can a man marry?"
> "Sixteen," the boy responded. His cousin was amazed that he had an
answer so
> quickly.
> "How do you know that?"
> "Easy," the little boy said. All you have to do is add it up, like the
Bishop said: 4 better, 4 worse, 4 richer, 4 poorer."
º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º? After a church service on Sunday morning, a young boy suddenly announced
to his mother, "Mom, I've decided to become a minister When I grow up.
> That's okay with us, but what made you decide that?"
> Well," said the little boy, "I have to go to church on Sunday anyway,
and I
> figure it will be more fun to stand up and yell, than to sit and
listen."
> º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?
> A 6-year-old was overheard reciting the Lord's Prayer at a church
> service: "And forgive us our trash passes, as we forgive those who
passed
> trash against us."
> º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?
> A boy was watching his father, a pastor, write a sermon.
> "How do you know what to say?" he asked.
> "Why, God tells me."
> "Oh, then why do you keep crossing things out?"
> º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º
> A little girl became restless as the preacher's sermon dragged on and
on. Finally, she leaned over to her mother and whispered, "Mommy, if we give him the money now, will he let us go?"
> º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º
> After the christening of his baby brother in church, little Johnny
> sobbed all the way home in the back seat of the car. His father asked
him three times what was wrong.
> Finally, the boy replied, "That priest said he wanted us brought up
> in a Christian home, and I want to stay with you guys!"
> º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?
> Terri asked her Sunday School class to draw pictures of their
> favorite Bible stories. She was puzzled by Kyle's picture, which showed
> four people on an airplane, so she asked him which story it was meant to represent.
> The Flight to Egypt, was his reply.
> Pointing at each figure, Ms. Terri said, "That must be Mary, Joseph,
> and Baby Jesus. But who's the fourth person?"
> "Oh, that's Pontius - the pilot.
> º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?
> The Sunday School Teacher asks, "Now, Johnny, tell me frankly do you
> say prayers before eating?"
> "No sir," little Johnny replies,
> "I don't have to. My Mom is a good cook."
> º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?
> Pastor Dave Charlton tells us, "After a worship service at First
> Baptist Church in Newcastle, Kentucky, a mother with a fidgety
seven-year
> old boy told me how she finally got her son to sit still and be quiet.
About halfway through the sermon, she leaned over and whispered, 'If you
don't be quiet, Pastor Charlton is going to lose his place and will have to start his sermon all over again!' It worked."
> º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?o,,,,o?º°'°º?o?º°'°º?
> This is the best one. A little girl was sitting on her grandfather's
> lap as he read her a bedtime story.
> From time to time, she would take her eyes off the book and reach up
> to touch his wrinkled cheek. She was alternately stroking her own cheek, then his again.
> Finally she spoke up, "Grandpa, did God make you?"
> "Yes, sweetheart," he answered, "God made me a long time ago."
> "Oh," she paused, "grandpa, did God make me too?"
> "Yes, indeed, honey," he said, "God made you just a little while ago."
> Feeling their respective faces again, she observed, God's getting
better at it, isn't he?"

Joke :MBA Students
ONE NIGHT 4 MBA STUDENTS WERE BOOZING TILL LATE
NIGHT AND DIDN'T STUDY FOR
THE TEST WHICH WAS SCHEDULED FOR THE NEXT DAY.
IN THE MORNING THEY THOUGHT OF A PLAN. THEY MADE
THEMSELVES LOOK AS DIRTY AND WEIRD AS THEY COULD WITH GREASE AND DIRT.THEY THEN WENT UP TO THE DEAN AND SAID THAT THEY HAD GONE OUT TO A WEDDING LAST NIGHT AND ON THEIR RETURN THE TYRE OF THEIR CAR BURST AND THEY HAD TO PUSHTHE CAR ALL THE WAYBACK AND THAT THEY WERE IN NO CONDITION TO APPEAR FOR THE TEST. THEN DEAN WAS A JUST PERSON SO HE SAID THAT YOU
CAN HAVE THE RETEST AFTER 3 DAYS.THEY SAID THEY WILL BE READY BY THAT TIME.ON THE THIRD DAY THEY APPEARED BEFORE THE DEAN.THE DEAN SAID THAT THIS WAS A SPECIAL CONDITION TEST.ALL FOUR WERE REQUIRED TO SIT IN SEPARATE CLASSROOMS
FOR THE TEST. THEY ALL AGREED AS THEY HAD PREPARED WELL IN THE
LAST THREE DAYS. THE TEST CONSISTED OF 2 QUESTIONS WITH TOTAL OF100 MARKS.
Q .1. WRITE DOWN YOUR NAMES -----( 2 MARKS )
Q.2. WHICH TYRE BURST -------( 98 MARKS )

Hope you enjoyed those I will write more tomorrow and keep well all of you!!
Ciao
Silver:P

Jokes, Info, Friday and "Kingdom of Heaven"

Hello all you people

I love a quote from the movie in which Orlando Bloom stars in called “Kingdom of Heaven”. The quote is as follows: “What man is a man who does not make the world better” – Balin. If you would like some links to check out the backround or trailers of this movie or just do a yahoo search. www.yahoo.com. Type “Kingdom of Heaven”.
Kingdom of Heaven Movie Page
www.kingdomofheavenmovie.com
If you are an Orlando Fan you can also check out “ElizabethTown” by typing in that name as well or www.Elizabethtown.com.

Joke: 2 Female parrots
A lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing." "What do they say?" the priest asked. "They only know how to say, 'Hi, we are prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?'" "That's terrible!" the priest exclaimed, "But I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two talking female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots who I have taught to pray and read the Bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn to pray and worship." "Thank you," said the lady. The next day, the lady brings her female parrots to the priest's house. The priest's two male parrots are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage. The lady puts her female talking parrots in with the male talking parrots and the female parrots say, "Hi, we are prostitutes! Do you want to have some fun?" One male parrot looks over to the other male parrot and screams, "Frank! Put the Bibles away--our prayers have been answered.

Bizzare Facts: 37 of them :P

1. Coca-Cola was originally green.2. The most common name in the world is Mohammed.3.The name of all the continents end with the same letter that theystart with.4. The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.5. There are two credit cards for every person in the United States.6. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the lettersonly on one row of the keyboard.7. Women blink nearly twice as much as men!8. You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.9. It is impossible to lick your elbow10. People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when you sneeze,yourheart stops for a millisecond.11. It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.12. The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be thetoughest tongue twister in the English language.13. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try tosuppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neckand die.14. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents great king fromhistory.Spades - King DavidClubs - Alexander the Great,Hearts - CharlemagneDiamonds - Julius Caesar.15. 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,32116. If a statue of a person in the park on a horse has both front legsin the air, the person died in battle.If the horse has one front leg in the air,the person died as a result ofwounds received in battle.If the horse has a all four legs on the ground, the person died ofnatural causes.17 What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers and laserprinters all have in common?Ans. - All invented by women.18. Question - This is the only food that doesn't spoil. What is this?Ans. - Honey19. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.20. A snail can sleep for three years.21. All polar bears are left handed.22. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olivefrom each salad served in first-class.23. Butterflies taste with their feet.24. Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.25. In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.26. On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.27. Shakespeare invented the word 'assassination' and 'bump'.28. Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left hand.29. The ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.30. The electric chair was invented by a dentist.31. The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out the bodyto squirt blood 30 feet.32. Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have overmillion descendants.
33. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria inyour ear by 700 times.34. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.35. Most lipstick contains fish scales.36. Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different37. And finally 99% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow

Joke: Beans & Cabbage
One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love. When it became
apparent that we would marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up
eating baked beans. Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way home from work. Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband and told him that I would be late because I had to walk home. On my way, I passed by a small diner and the odour of baked beans was more than I could stand. With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off any ill effects by the time I reached home, so I stopped at the diner and before I knew it, I had consumed three large orders of baked beans. All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas. Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see me and exclaimed delightedly: "Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight." He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang. He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call. The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously. Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage. Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room. I went on like this for another few minutes. The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the telephone farewells signalled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself. My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband returned, apologising for taking so long. He asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not. At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table chorused: "Happy Birthday!" I almost fainted.

Info: Things that people love doing (1-45)
>> 1. Falling in love.
>> 2. Laughing so hard your face hurts.
>> 3. A hot shower.
>> 4. No lines at the supermarket
>> 5. A special glance.
>> 6. Getting mail
>> 7. Taking a drive on a pretty road
>> 8. Hearing your favorite song on the radio.
>> 9. Lying in bed listening to the rain outside.
>> 10. Hot towels fresh out of the dryer.
>> 11. Chocolate milkshake. (or vanilla or strawberry!)
>> 12. A bubble bath.
>> 13. Giggling.
>> 14. A good conversation.
>> 15. The beach
>> 16. Finding a 20 dollar bill in your coat from last winter.
>> 17. Laughing at yourself.
>> 19. Midnight phone calls that last for hours
>> 20. Running through sprinklers.
>> 21. Laughing for absolutely no reason at all
>> 22 Having someone tell you that you're beautiful.
>> 23. Laughing at an inside joke.
>> 24. Friends.
>> 25. Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you.
>> 26. Waking up and realizing you still have a few hours left to sleep.
>> 27. Your first kiss (either the very first or with a new partner).
>> 28. Making new friends or spending time with old ones.
>> 29. Playing with a new puppy
>> 30. Having someone play with your hair.
>> 31. Sweet dreams.
>> 32. Hot chocolate.
>> 33. Road trips with friends.
>> 34. Swinging on swings.
>> 35. Making eye contact with a cute stranger.
>> 36. Making chocolate chip cookies.
>> 37. Having your friends send you homemade cookies.
>> 38. Holding hands with someone you care about.
>> 39. Running into an old friend and realizing that some things (good
>> or bad) never change.
>> 40. Watching the expression on someone's face as they open a much
>> desired present from you.
>> 41. Watching the sunrise.
>> 42. Getting out of bed every morning and being grateful for another
>> beautiful day.
>> 43. Knowing that somebody misses you.
>> 44. Getting a hug from someone you care about deeply.
>> 45. Knowing you've done the right thing, no matter what other people
>> think.

Hope you guys all have a great weekend
And I will write to you all again on Monday
Ciao
Silver
:P

Info, Jokes and it's thursday!!!

Hi all,

Info: Physical Laws
Law of Mechanical Repair:
After your hands become coated with grease, your nose will begin to itch.
Law of the Workshop:
Any tool, when dropped, will roll to the least accessible corner.
Law of the Telephone:
When you dial a wrong number, you never get an engaged tone.
Law of the Alibi:
If you tell the boss you were late for work because you had a flat tire, the Next morning you will have a flat tire.
Variation Law:
If you change queues, the one you have left will start to move faster than the one you are in now.
Bath Theorem:
When the body is immersed in water, the telephone rings.
Law of Close Encounters:
The probability of meeting someone you know increases when you are with someone you don't want to be seen with.
Law of the Result:
When you try to prove to someone that a machine won't work, it will.
Law of Biomechanics:
The severity of the itch is inversely proportional to the reach.
Theatre Rule:
At any event, the people whose seats are furthest from the aisle arrive last.
Law of Coffee:
As soon as you sit down to a cup of hot coffee, your boss will ask you to do something which will last until the coffee is cold

Joke : Men
How many men does it take to open a beer?None. It should be opened when she brings it.------------------------------------------------------------------- Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably never be able to support you.-------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do women have smaller feet than men?It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allowsthem to stand closer to the kitchen sink.-------------------------------------------------------------------How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."------------------------------------------------------------------- How do you fix a woman's watch?You don't. There is a clock on the oven.------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do men fart more than women?Because women can't shut up long enough tobuild up the required pressure.------------------------------------------------------------------- If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the front door, who do you let in first?The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.------------------------------------------------------------------- What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?A woman who won't do what she's told.------------------------------------------------------------------- I married a Miss Right.I just didn't know her first name was Always.------------------------------------------------------------------- Scientists have discovered a food that diminishesa woman's sex drive by 90%.It's called a Wedding Cake.------------------------------------------------------------------- Why do men die before their wives?They want to.------------------------------------------------------------------- Women will never be equal to men until they canwalk down the street with a bald head and a beergut, and still think they are sexy.-------------------------------------------------------------------In the beginning, God created the earth and rested.Then God created Man and rested.Then God created Woman.Since then, neither God nor Man has rested.

Joke: Ah Women
A typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after thewedding, he laid down the following rules:1). "I'll be home when I want, if I want and at the time I want andI don't expect any hassle from you. 2). I expect a great dinner to be on the table unless I tell youthat I won't be home for dinner.3). I'll go hunting, fishing, drinking and card-playing when I wantwith my buddies and don't you ever complain about it."Those are my rules. Any comments?"His new bride replied, "No, that's all just fine with me. But pleaseunderstand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night......... whether you're here or not."************************************Marriage (Part II)Husband and wife had a bitter quarrel on the day of their 40thwedding anniversary!The husband yells, "When you die, I'm getting you a headstonethat reads:"Here Lies My Wife - Cold As Ever ""Yeah?" she replies. "When you die, I'm getting you a headstonethat reads:"Here Lies My Husband Stiff At Last"*****************************Marriage (Part III)Husband (a doctor) and his wife are having a fight at the breakfasttable.Husband gets up in a rage and says, "And you are no good in bedeither," and storms out of the house.After sometime, he realizes he was nasty and decides to make amendsand rings her up. She comes to the phone after many rings, and theirritated husband says, "what took you so long to answer the phone?"She says, "I was in bed.""In bed this early, doing what?""Getting a second opinion!"******************************************Marriage (Part IV)A man has six children and is very proud of his achievement. He is soproud of himself, that he starts calling his wife, "Mother ofSix" in spite of her objections.One night, they go to a party. The man decides that it's time to gohome and wants to find out if his wife is ready to leave as well.He shouts at the top of his voice, "Shall we go home 'Mother of Six?'His wife, irritated by her husband's lack of discretion, shoutsback, "Anytime you're ready, Father of Four."**************************************Marriage (Part V) The Silent TreatmentA man and his wife were having some problems at home and weregiving each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realizedthat the next day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AMfor an early morning business flight. Not wanting to be the first tobreak the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,"Please wake me at 5:00 AM." He left it where he knew she would find it.The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM andhe had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by the bed.The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up."

Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.God may have created man before woman, but there is always arough draft before the masterpiece.

Joke: The elephant and the camel
An elephant asks a camel: " why are your breasts on your back ?" " Well " says the camel ,
" I think it is a strange question from somebody who's dick is on his face"

Bye
Silver
:P

Movies, jokes and it is so Winter still!!!

Hello People,
Hope u are well… Sorry i 4got to write yesterday but as i always say i am buzy i just do my best to at least get the blog on once a day!!!!Can you believe it is already Wednesday today time is passing so quickly!! The weather is a bit better today but it is still chilly in the morning’s. Well watched “Texas Rangers” with James Van Der Beek and Dylan Mcdermott as well as “Kickboxer 2 & 3” with Sasha Mitchell. They are very good movies full of action and movies I would definetly watch again.Well here is some stories, jokes and things you should know…

Story:Why GOD Created ChildrenWHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN(AND IN THE PROCESS GRANDCHILDREN)
To those of us who have children in our lives,whether they are our own, grandchildren,nieces, nephews, or students...here is something to make you chuckle.Whenever your children are out of control,you can take comfort from the thought thateven God's omnipotence did not extendto His own children.After creating heaven and earth,God created Adam and Eve.And the first thing he said was"DON'T!" "Don't what ?"Adam replied. "Don't eat the forbidden fruit."God said. "Forbidden fruit ?We have forbidden fruit ?Hey Eve..we have forbidden fruit! " "No Way !" "Yes way !" "Do NOT eat the fruit ! "said God. "Why? " "Because I am your Father and I said so ! "God replied,wondering why He hadn't stoppedcreation after making the elephants.A few minutes later,God saw His children having an apple breakand He was ticked."Didn't I tell you not to eat the fruit? "God asked. "Uh huh," Adam replied. "Then why did you ? "said the Father. "I don't know,"said Eve. "She started it ! "Adam said. "Did not ! "Did too ! "DID NOT ! " Having had it with the two of them,God's punishment was that Adam and Eveshould have children of their own.Thus the pattern was set and it has never changed.
BUT THERE IS REASSURANCE IN THE STORY !If you have persistently and lovingly tried to give children wisdom and they haven't taken it,don't be hard on yourself.If God had trouble raising children,what makes you think it would bea piece of cake for you ?
THINGS TO THINK ABOUT !1. You spend the first two years of their lifeteaching them to walk and talk. Then you spendthe next sixteen telling them to sit down and shut up. 2. Grandchildren are God's rewardfor not killing your own children. 3. Mothers of teens now know whysome animals eat their young. 4. Children seldom misquote you.In fact,they usually repeat word for wordwhat you shouldn't have said.5. The main purpose of holding children's partiesis to remind yourself that there are childrenmore awful than your own. 6. We childproofed our homes,but they are still getting in.
ADVICE FOR THE DAY:Be nice to your kids.They will choose yournursing home one day.
AND FINALLY:
IF YOU HAVE A LOT OF TENSIONAND YOU GET A HEADACHE,DO WHAT IT SAYSON THE ASPIRIN BOTTLE: "TAKE TWO ASPIRIN"AND "KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN"!!!!!
Joke:Tattoo
A gay man decides to get a tattoo. On arrival to the tattooist he spots apicture of Evander Holyfield."Oh! He's my favorite darling. Can you do him on the cheek of my ass?" heasked the tattooist.So it was done. On the way out of the store he spotted another picture onthe wall, this time Mike Tyson. "Oh, good Lord!" the queer blurted out. "I just adore Iron Mike! Can you do him on my other cheek?"So it was done. On returning home, his boyfriend says, "Well, drop yourtrousers, give us a look." He dropped his pants and showed his ass.His boyfriend gasped and replied, "I think our relationship is over! Isure as hell ain't getting in the ring with those two."

Things u need to know:Pregnancy, Estrogen, and Women PREGNANCY Q &A &more!
Q: Should I have a baby after 35? A: No, 35 children is more than enough. Q: I'm two months pregnant now. When will my baby move? A: With any luck, right after he finishes college. Q: What is the most reliable method to determine a baby's sex? A: Childbirth. Q: My wife is five months pregnant and so moody that sometimes she's borderline irrational. A: So what's your question? Q: My childbirth instructor says it's not pain I'll feel during labor, but pressure. Is she right? A! : Yes, in the same way that a tornado might be called an air current. Q: When is the best time to get an epidural? A: Right after you find out you're pregnant. Q: Is there any reason I have to be in the delivery room while my wife is in labor? A: Not unless the word "alimony" means anything to you. Q: Is there anything I should avoid while recovering from childbirth? A: Yes, pregnancy. Q: Do I have to have a baby shower? A: Not if you change the baby's diaper very quickly. Q: Our baby was born last week. When will my wife begin to feel and act normal again? A: When the kids are in college.
"ESTROGEN ISSUES"
10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN ISSUES"
1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem. 2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet 3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans. 4. Your husband is sudden! ly agreeing to everything you say. 5. You're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker that says: "How's my driving-call 1- 800-" 6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice. 7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from outer space." 8. You can't believe they don't make a tampon bigger than Super Plus. 9. You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy. 10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday.
TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND
10. Cats' facial expressions. 9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors. 8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds. 7 . Fat clothes. 6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time. 5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white, and eggshell. 4. Cutting your hair to make it grow. 3. Eyelash curlers. 2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made. AND, the Number One Number One thing only women understand: OTHER WOMEN

Did u Enjoy??
Have a great week!!
Ciao
Silver :P

Story, Movies and Sa Joke!!! :)

Hey all,
Well Monday again and the weather isn’t to great either. Been very buzy working and all that. Watched 2 great movies actually 4 lol :P “After the Sunset” with Pierce Brosnan and Salma Hayek, “Braveheart” with Mel Gibson and Brendon Gleeson and “Born on the 4th of July” Tom Cruise and Stephen Baldwin. As well as “Rollerball” with Chris Klein. My gran turned 87, she looks very good for her age and I am very glad that she is so well.

Story:They Missed Him! Author: Unknown
They were looking for a lion, He came as a Lamb, and they missed Him. They were looking for a warrior, He came as a Peacemaker, and they missed Him. They were looking for a king, He came as a Servant, and they missed Him. They were looking for liberation from Rome, He submitted to the Roman stake, and they missed Him. They were looking for a fit to their mold, He was the mold maker, and they missed Him. What are you looking for? Lion? Warrior? King? Liberator? What are you looking for? They were looking for their temporal needs to be met, He came to meet their eternal need, and they missed Him. He came as a Lamb to be sacrificed for your sin. Will you miss Him? He came to make peace between God and man. Will you miss Him? He came to model servanthood for all mankind. Will you miss Him? He came that we might have true liberty. Will you miss Him? He came to give you eternal life. Will you miss Him? When we submit to the Lamb, we will meet the Lion. Join with the Peacemaker, and we will meet the Warrior. Work with the Servant, and we will meet the King. Walk with the Submitted, and we will meet the Liberator. Concern ourselves with the eternal, and we will have the temporal. If Jesus is not fitting into the mold you have, then come to the mold maker and get a new one. Submit to His plan for your life and you will see the eternal need met first; then all the other things you have need of will be taken care of as well. “Therefore let us not sleep, as do others; but let us watch and be sober.” -1 Thessalonians 5:6 “Laat ons dan nie slaap soos die ander nie, maar laat ons waak en nugter wees.” -1 Thessalonians 5:6

SA Joke: Would you get an "A" in Geography?
I phoned a colleague in Cape Town and wanted to leave a message.
"Please ask him to phone me in Polokwane," I said.
"Where?" his secretary asked sounding as if she had bitten into a
lemon, "Polokwane, where's that?"
"Between Mokopane and Makhado in Limpopo," I said.
"Where is that?" she asked patiently.
I could hear she thought she had a joker on the line.
"Well,"I explained, "you drive from Tshwane past Bela-Bela and
Modimolle through the tollgate.
Continue past Mokopane but watch your speed as speed traps make lots
of money from those travelling too fast.
Polokwane is just after Mokopane but if you reach Makahado you have
gone too far."
I was not sure how we'd ended up on the road route when all I wanted
was a telephone call.
"Just hold it right there sir," she interrupted. "Where is Makhado?"
"Between Polokwane and Musina," I said trying to be helpful.
"Excuse me, sir, but where is Musina?"
"Musina is between Makhado and Harare."
"Do you live in Harare?" she asked as if she'd suddenly seen the
light.
"No," I said, "I am trying to explain where Polokwane is."
"In Zimbabwe?" she asked hopefully.
"No, in Limpopo," I corrected her. She gave a helpless sigh and
said:
"Please can we start again."
I thought at this stage she might be thinking she was live on air
with Leon Schuster and she became a
bit wary.
"Where is Tshwane?" "That's easy," I said ... "between Bela-Bela and
Egoli."
No sir, I mean the town."
"So do I," said I, figuring she was now into soapies while I was
still on the road so to speak.
"Egoli is on the other side of Tshwane when coming from the
direction of Bela-Bela," I said.
"Excuse me, have you perhaps had too much to drink?"
"No," I said, "I am not drunk. They changed the name."
"Do you mean someone has changed your name?"
"Not my name, the town's name." "What town's name?" "Pietersburg."
"You live in Pietersburg!" she cried with delight.
I could detect the dawn of understanding.
"No," I said, "I live in Polokwane, formerly known as Pietersburg."
"No s**t?" she blurted.
"No s**t!" I confirmed.
"So you're phoning from Polokwane previously know as Pietersburg?"
"Exactly." "Now what were all the other names you mentioned?"
I realised the poor lass needed a lesson in the geography of our country pretty quickly so I explained:
"Egoli is Johannesburg.
Tshwane is Pretoria.
If you travel north you pass Bela-Bela, formerly Warmbaths, after
that Modimolle that was
Nylstroom and Potgietersrust that is Mokopane now. After Mokopane
you get Polokwane that was Pietersburg then Louis Trichardt that became
Makhado. After you have passed Makhado you get Musina that was originally
Messina."
"And Musina is by the Limpopo!" she exclaimed triumphantly.
"Yes," I said, "but the Limpopo I was speaking of is the province."
"What do you call the river then?"
"Limpopo," I said.
"Blooming hell!"

Write More tomorrow
Ciao
Silver
:P

Friday, poem and joke!!

Hello u all,
How u all doing im so glad that it is Friday!!

Interesting Links:
http://sexandtheuniversitygirl.blogspot.com/

Joke: Chinese Laundry
A woman sends her clothing out to the Chinese laundry. When it came
back
> there are still stains in her panties. The next week she encloses a
note
> to the Chinese laundryman that says, "Use more soap on panties."
>
> This goes on for several weeks, the woman sending the same note to the

> laundry. "Use more soap on panties."
> Finally fed up the Chinese man responded with his own note that said,
>"Use more paper on ass."

Poem:You Can Do It!
If you think you are beaten, you are,If you think you dare not, you don't!If you'd like to win, but think you can't,It's almost a cinch you won't!If you think you'll lose, you've lost.For out in the world you'll findSuccess begins with a person's willIt's all in your state of mind!If you think you're outclassed you are,You've got to think high to rise,You've got to be sure of yourself--think that YOU CAN and that YOU WILLBefore you can win that prize.Life's battles don't always goto the strongest or faster man,But sooner or later the person who winsIs the person who thinks he can!

Enjoy ur weekend
chat to you all on Monday
Ciao
Silver :P