Jokes, Info, Friday and "Kingdom of Heaven"

Hello all you people

I love a quote from the movie in which Orlando Bloom stars in called “Kingdom of Heaven”. The quote is as follows: “What man is a man who does not make the world better” – Balin. If you would like some links to check out the backround or trailers of this movie or just do a yahoo search. www.yahoo.com. Type “Kingdom of Heaven”.
Kingdom of Heaven Movie Page
www.kingdomofheavenmovie.com
If you are an Orlando Fan you can also check out “ElizabethTown” by typing in that name as well or www.Elizabethtown.com.

Joke: 2 Female parrots
A lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I have a problem. I have these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing." "What do they say?" the priest asked. "They only know how to say, 'Hi, we are prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?'" "That's terrible!" the priest exclaimed, "But I have a solution to your problem. Bring your two talking female parrots over to my house and I will put them with my two male talking parrots who I have taught to pray and read the Bible. My parrots will teach your parrots to stop saying that terrible phrase and your female parrots will learn to pray and worship." "Thank you," said the lady. The next day, the lady brings her female parrots to the priest's house. The priest's two male parrots are holding rosary beads and praying in their cage. The lady puts her female talking parrots in with the male talking parrots and the female parrots say, "Hi, we are prostitutes! Do you want to have some fun?" One male parrot looks over to the other male parrot and screams, "Frank! Put the Bibles away--our prayers have been answered.

Bizzare Facts: 37 of them :P

1. Coca-Cola was originally green.2. The most common name in the world is Mohammed.3.The name of all the continents end with the same letter that theystart with.4. The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.5. There are two credit cards for every person in the United States.6. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the lettersonly on one row of the keyboard.7. Women blink nearly twice as much as men!8. You can't kill yourself by holding your breath.9. It is impossible to lick your elbow10. People say "Bless you" when you sneeze because when you sneeze,yourheart stops for a millisecond.11. It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.12. The "sixth sick sheik's sixth sheep's sick" is said to be thetoughest tongue twister in the English language.13. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try tosuppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neckand die.14. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents great king fromhistory.Spades - King DavidClubs - Alexander the Great,Hearts - CharlemagneDiamonds - Julius Caesar.15. 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987,654,32116. If a statue of a person in the park on a horse has both front legsin the air, the person died in battle.If the horse has one front leg in the air,the person died as a result ofwounds received in battle.If the horse has a all four legs on the ground, the person died ofnatural causes.17 What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers and laserprinters all have in common?Ans. - All invented by women.18. Question - This is the only food that doesn't spoil. What is this?Ans. - Honey19. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.20. A snail can sleep for three years.21. All polar bears are left handed.22. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olivefrom each salad served in first-class.23. Butterflies taste with their feet.24. Elephants are the only animals that can't jump.25. In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.26. On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.27. Shakespeare invented the word 'assassination' and 'bump'.28. Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left hand.29. The ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.30. The electric chair was invented by a dentist.31. The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out the bodyto squirt blood 30 feet.32. Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have overmillion descendants.
33. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria inyour ear by 700 times.34. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.35. Most lipstick contains fish scales.36. Like fingerprints, everyone's tongue print is different37. And finally 99% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow

Joke: Beans & Cabbage
One day I met a sweet gentleman and fell in love. When it became
apparent that we would marry, I made the supreme sacrifice and gave up
eating baked beans. Some months later, on my birthday, my car broke down on the way home from work. Since I lived in the countryside I called my husband and told him that I would be late because I had to walk home. On my way, I passed by a small diner and the odour of baked beans was more than I could stand. With miles to walk, I figured that I would walk off any ill effects by the time I reached home, so I stopped at the diner and before I knew it, I had consumed three large orders of baked beans. All the way home, I made sure that I released all the gas. Upon my arrival, my husband seemed excited to see me and exclaimed delightedly: "Darling I have a surprise for dinner tonight." He then blindfolded me and led me to my chair at the dinner table. I took a seat and just as he was about to remove my blindfold, the telephone rang. He made me promise not to touch the blindfold until he returned and went to answer the call. The baked beans I had consumed were still affecting me and the pressure was becoming most unbearable, so while my husband was out of the room I seized the opportunity, shifted my weight to one leg and let one go. It was not only loud, but it smelled like a fertilizer truck running over a skunk in front of a pulpwood mill. I took my napkin from my lap and fanned the air around me vigorously. Then, shifting to the other cheek, I ripped off three more. The stink was worse than cooked cabbage. Keeping my ears carefully tuned to the conversation in the other room. I went on like this for another few minutes. The pleasure was indescribable. When eventually the telephone farewells signalled the end of my freedom, I quickly fanned the air a few more times with my napkin, placed it on my lap and folded my hands back on it feeling very relieved and pleased with myself. My face must have been the picture of innocence when my husband returned, apologising for taking so long. He asked me if I had peeked through the blindfold, and I assured him I had not. At this point, he removed the blindfold, and twelve dinner guests seated around the table chorused: "Happy Birthday!" I almost fainted.

Info: Things that people love doing (1-45)
>> 1. Falling in love.
>> 2. Laughing so hard your face hurts.
>> 3. A hot shower.
>> 4. No lines at the supermarket
>> 5. A special glance.
>> 6. Getting mail
>> 7. Taking a drive on a pretty road
>> 8. Hearing your favorite song on the radio.
>> 9. Lying in bed listening to the rain outside.
>> 10. Hot towels fresh out of the dryer.
>> 11. Chocolate milkshake. (or vanilla or strawberry!)
>> 12. A bubble bath.
>> 13. Giggling.
>> 14. A good conversation.
>> 15. The beach
>> 16. Finding a 20 dollar bill in your coat from last winter.
>> 17. Laughing at yourself.
>> 19. Midnight phone calls that last for hours
>> 20. Running through sprinklers.
>> 21. Laughing for absolutely no reason at all
>> 22 Having someone tell you that you're beautiful.
>> 23. Laughing at an inside joke.
>> 24. Friends.
>> 25. Accidentally overhearing someone say something nice about you.
>> 26. Waking up and realizing you still have a few hours left to sleep.
>> 27. Your first kiss (either the very first or with a new partner).
>> 28. Making new friends or spending time with old ones.
>> 29. Playing with a new puppy
>> 30. Having someone play with your hair.
>> 31. Sweet dreams.
>> 32. Hot chocolate.
>> 33. Road trips with friends.
>> 34. Swinging on swings.
>> 35. Making eye contact with a cute stranger.
>> 36. Making chocolate chip cookies.
>> 37. Having your friends send you homemade cookies.
>> 38. Holding hands with someone you care about.
>> 39. Running into an old friend and realizing that some things (good
>> or bad) never change.
>> 40. Watching the expression on someone's face as they open a much
>> desired present from you.
>> 41. Watching the sunrise.
>> 42. Getting out of bed every morning and being grateful for another
>> beautiful day.
>> 43. Knowing that somebody misses you.
>> 44. Getting a hug from someone you care about deeply.
>> 45. Knowing you've done the right thing, no matter what other people
>> think.

Hope you guys all have a great weekend
And I will write to you all again on Monday
Ciao
Silver
:P